Subject: OK, I surrender

From: iDRMRSR <alex.i.thymia@depression.org>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Fri, Sep 21, 2001 10:27 PM
Message-ID: <51FE8E661882457C.3F34754FEF3F5555.BE40927782E1A0E0@lp.airnews.net>

That's it. Now we've started a nationwide Telethon. I give up.

Please, to quote John Voight in Deliverance, "tell me what you gentlemen
require". I will do my best to comply. Even though, personally, my
feelings towards Western decadence, and Zionism, may both be categorized
as indifferent, I'm not too old to learn to bend over when that's going
to hurt a lot less than the alternatives.

I can chant slogans for you. I can regrow my beard. Hell, I'll even
stone unswathed women, if that's what it takes. Just make it all stop,
will you? Make it all stop for ME, OK? Send me phrasebooks from your
little squiggly lined languages, your holy books, tell me what parts to
memorize. Like I said, I give up.

You'll be glad you did. You'll see just how fast I'll be doing
everything you want. I go to work every day and do lots of things I
wouldn't do unless I was paid, so this won't be much different. If you
like, I can have my boss send you some of my performance reviews. I'm
sure you'll find me to be a rather desparate suck-ass.

I'll be waiting in heated anticipation to receive your list of demands.
I'm anxious to get on board, as you can see. Preferably before this
Telethon is over. Thank you for your time and consideration.

[*]
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Original file name: OK, I surrender - converted on Monday, 24 September 2001, 21:28