7-28-00 StangReport

BUSTING ASS HAVING FUN, that's what I've been doing, with a healthy smattering of sitting on my ass having fun thrown in.

Firstly, thanks to Rev. David Bachner, Hour of Slack is now streaming in MP3! To hear the most current show, 744 the TRIPLE-XXX-DAY SPECIAL (Part One), go here:

HOUR OF SLACK #744 in MP3 at LIVE 365

It works GREAT!!!!! Here's the LOG of that show plus some technical notes.

I will be sending the new ALL-DIGITAL show CDs to Bachner, and hopefully they'll appear weekly on the Internet, as I produce them and send them out.

The sound quality is INFINITELY better. Bachner is a fucking GENIUS!! (But... doesn't that DISQUALIFY him from our august assemblage??)

Yesterday I finished HoS 745, THE PASTOR CRAIG SACRIFICIAL SPECIAL, and I must say it is one of the FUNNIEST Hours of Slack EVER -- not because Pastor Craig got hurt, but because of the way we all did our best to make an EPIC EVENT of that NHGH-attack. Details about that show are posted elsewhere. I will be mailing the CD copies to the stations today. I am REALLY proud of this show, and it was a GAS to edit, because I had finally gotten used to the process, and I tweaked the HELL out of it. This digital editting is SO FUN that I have already invented 3 new transitions.

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I have in my hand a CD. On this CD, there are 150 HOURS OF SLACK in MP3 and WAV, made by Rev. Tomwhore, Esq., of Lemuria, and advised by Onan of Lemuria.

ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY HOURS OF SLACK.

Of course, we will strive to make this CD, or something like it, available to Subs. Rev. Tomwhore did not work from cassette copies of the shows, but from RealAudio files downloaded from SubSITE; but skillful conversion has made them quite listenable! I was shocked, and we're still reeling, mewling and puking from the possibilities.

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Magdalen and Jesus have learned Flash, the vector animation program, and Magdalen used my video pics of XXX-Day to create a TRULY inspiring and hilarious "MUSICAL SLIDE SHOW" that sums up the whole XXXDay event PERFECTLY. See: http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/FIST2000-4/XXX-daynews/flash/xdaymovie.htm

Rev. Codini has an animation about XXXX-Day, 2001, that is even slicker, but far more OMINOUS: http://www.mrcontent.com/7rings/

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STARWOOD 2000

Right on the heels of XXX-Day came Starwood, the huge neopagan fest also held at Brushwood; Wei and I just returned from almost a whole week camping there. The swag I brought back to share with the SubGenii include excellent digital recordings of:

1. a live Einstein's Secret Orchestra concert, the best yet

2. another Stang solo rant to the pagans -- I was in TOP FORM if I do say so myself, since preaching to the unconverted is a SPECIAL CHALLENGE and actually MUCH more fun than preaching to the Dobbs Choir. The first half is solid improv and the second half is a much-mutatING version of my recent "suicide rant."

3. another ESO/Stang "space trance devival" recorded in The Pufferdome, a huge inflatable sphere with UNUSUAL ACCOUSTICS which A.C.E. rents for each Starwood. Except for the new "Multiple Jesii" material, this performance was (like the weekly ESO radio show) totally improvised from front to back.

4. another live recording of Revelry, Sister Melodious Chopps' 3-gal folk singing group that includes Princess Wei -- with their new song "PAGAN FEST BARBIE."

I can't remember who said my rants at XXX-Day were "mostly old material," but whoever it was, FUCK 'EM -- he must have been one tired, jealous, pissed-off motherfucker, because I have been going through the tapes, and if this guy thinks the stuff I've been doing is "old," then he must have been VERY clairvoyant for a long time already... 'cause it's sure mostly new to ME. That accusation has been eating at me for 3 weeks now as I keep trying to figure out what he meant. I've just about decided that there are some people for whom our successes are seen strictly as contrast against THEIR FAILURES, so they tend to concentrate on our failures. Either that or they consider "Bob," Slack and the Conspiracy to be no longer "TRENDY" enough concepts. CREEPY!!

The Pufferdome devival was visually enhanced by TWO VIDEO PROJECTORS placed OUTSIDE the dome by St. Joe Rothenberg, ACE co-sub-founder. One projector showed my old devival barrage psychedelia (a compressed ARISE, sort of) and the other showed night-vision live video of ESO and me. Projected onto the curving spherical canvas walls, it looked PRETTY SPIFFY from inside and out. (The Pufferdome only holds 40 people and there were 40 to 60 more who had to watch from outside.)

Also, I unveiled the new ALL METAL DOBBSHEADS by the a.b.s. arteest "WHYASKWHY" aka Blackout. and used one to project weird warping Dobbsheads on the Pufferdome ceiling using a high powered flashlight. CHEAP THRILLS INDEED!!

Dances With Rockets' TRANQUILITY BASE cult compound (Brushwood home of ESO) looked more cultish and cool than ever, with Chas' museum of black-light monsters and manniquins displayed to seductive effect. Early in the festival, Chas had been using police tape to help his camping nieghbors "fence off" their areas, when one of those "faerie wood" pagans came along and scolded Chas for "ruining their sense of community" by making this temporary fence. Chas proceeded to spend the rest of the festival SUCKING ALL THE REST OF THEIR SENSE OF COMMUNITY AWAY... simply by turning Tranquility Base into THE hang-out. All festival long, the ESO HQ was packed with pagan lesbians, pagan runaways, little pagan kids getting free violin lessons from Michele, and free violence lessons from Lonesome Cowboy Dave, and anyone else needing a break from the cloying, deadly-serious, Slack-killing ponderousness and bleak pretentiousness of some wheelchair pagans.

All in all, though, EVEN *I* had a GREAT time at this Starwood. ESO, Wei and I were completely finished with our work by Thursday night, so the whole rest of the festival, we KICKED BACK! I spent a couple of hours each day manning the Dobbsian Sales Booth, but mostly I just wandered around visiting old friends, enjoying the crafts and music, and ogling titties.

SubGenii who only visit Brushwood during X-Day Drills would be ASTOUNDED to see it during Starwood, which attracts around 1500 people. The campground turns into a veritable EWOK VILLAGE. I took a lot of pictures specifically so that ya'll can see what I mean -- I'll have 'em on SubSITE in the Used Devivals area this weekend, I hope. I would heartily recommend Starwood to SOME SubGenii. It's like $125 I think, but if you stay the week it's a cheap vacation in a lovely place... and most of the attendees are NOT actually the stereotyped whiny pagan fanboy NOR whiny stuffed shirt pagan "shaman" types, but weirdos of diverse interests looking for a GOOD TIME.

There's plenty of the "shamanic drum making" and "visualize your interior childscape" crap if you want it, but that's mostly tucked back in the woods in little hushed workshops. That crass class satirist Paul Krassner was one of the main speakers this year, and though drum superstar Olatunji had to cancel this year, there were nonstop GREAT BANDS of all flavors onstage. The real appeal of Starwood, however, is STARWOOD ITSELF, the weird community as a whole that assembles every year for one week, like a brain damaged sex crazed Brigadoon, at which everyone is Rebuilding Their Own Amsterdam moment by moment. This was the twentieth Starwood, and my tenth (also the tenth at Brushwood). I LOVE STARWOOD.

Eleven years ago, I never would have imagined that I'd be singing the praises of a "NEOPAGAN GATHERING. But, looking back... HERE'S A *SMALL* SAMPLING OF SOME OF THE SUBGENII THAT I FIRST HAPPENED TO MEET AT STARWOOD FESTIVAL:

Rev. J.C. "Jesus" Bevilacqua
Dr. K'taden Legume
Princess Wei "R." Doe
Frank, Darlene, and Theresa Barney (owners of brushwood)
Rev. Craig Mitchell
Sister Mary Squared (OOOPS!)
Sister Melodious Chopps

There is also a growing list of SubGenius/pagan COUPLES who originally met at Brushwood (either at X-Day Drills or at Starwood). Usually it's a SubGenius boy and a pagan girl, but sometimes it's the other way around. Jesus and Magdalen... Stang and Wei... Rev. Toth Wilder and Sister Magdalena Hagdalena... Pee Kity and Jewyl... Bleepo and Gobi (OOPS! Maybe I better stop there).

Here is a *partial* list of people/groups that I met directly because of my association with A.C.E. (Association of Consciousness Exploration, in Cleveland, who produce Starwood (http://www.rosencomet.com)):
Lonesome Cowboy Dave, Chas Smith, ESO
WCSB-FM at Cleveland State
Dennis and Linda Murphy (Cult of the Living Bull)
Paul Krassner
The Euclid Tavern
Jeff Rosenbaum, Joe Rothenberg, Ron Slabe, ALL THE CHAMELEON CLUB MEMBERS
Circus Apocalypse
My travel agent, Joyce Levine

All this because Jeff Rosenbaum invited me to speak at Starwood X in 1990!

This Starwood featured the biggest bonfire yet (the wood pyramid being 25' high and 50' across), MORE gigantic puppets and stilt-walkers striding through the human crowds, and, most novel of all to the old-timers, GOURMET FOOD! One could devour special dishes like CRABS'S LEGS and MAINE LOBSTERS flown in and cooked on the spot.

"Waxing" seemed to be a new bonfire activity this year. One espies the occasional couple making love semi-covertly near the fire, late at night, but this was the first year that I saw youths drip hot wax on each others' bare chests for fun. I guess this would be what you'd call "getting to Second-and-a-half Base." Safe sex sure LOOKS dangerous sometimes.

The pagans who love "Bob" now outnumber the ones who mistakenly think they "get it" (and thus hate SubGenius). There's still the occasional spasm of "Bob"-hate from certain loveburgers, though.

Late Saturday night -- REAL late -- our friend Dr. Lee was walking down the otherwise almost deserted camp road, and was passing ESO's Tranquillity Base, which among other bric-a-brac had the giant plywood painting of "Bob" by Chris Yambar leaning up against a tree. As Dr. lee walked by, A YOUNG BOY, all alone, ran up to the Dobbshead painting with a disgusted look on his face AND KICKED IT IN THE NOSE with great feeling and vehemence. Then the boy ran off into the darkness, looking satisfied.

A parent who hates "Bob"?

Or one that loves "Bob"?

Either way, whether that kid knows it or not, whether he WANTS it or not, HE'S GOT THE "BOB" SPIRIT!!


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Original file name: 7-28-00 Stang Report - converted on Saturday, 29 July 2000, 18:04

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