Subject: Why Beer is better then me.

From: (Jesus Christ)
Date: Thu, 18 Jul 1996
Organization: Church of the SubGenius

Actually, I am better then beer because no one who ever "drank of my cup"
ever ended up puking for hours the next morning. No matter how many times
they returned to the fountain.

Anyway, thought some of you sick bastards might enjoy this.

>When Christian students at Texas A&M University donned pro-abstinence
>T-shirts bearing the legend "Top 10 Reasons Jesus Is Better Than
>Beer", Steve Berry of Texas A&M's Agnostic and Atheist Student Group
>knew how to respond:
>Top 10 Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Jesus
>10. No one will kill you for not drinking Beer.
> 9. Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.
> 8. Beer has never caused a major war.
> 7. They don't force Beer on minors who can't think for themselves.
> 6. When you have Beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to
> give it away.
> 5. Nobody's ever been burned at the stake, hanged or tortured over
> their brand of Beer.
> 4. You don't have to wait more than 2,000 years for a second Beer.
> 3. There are laws saying that Beer labels can't lie to you.
> 2. You can prove you have a Beer.
> 1. If you've devoted your life to Beer, there are groups to help you stop.

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