TRY THIS URL: http://www.concourse.com/hos/video/

Prostata has mounted a CD of SubGenius videos -- not the ones from this week, but the ones I posted last month -- so one can now download OR PLAY THEM, STREAMING, from that site through a browser. Ya'll -- TRY SOME and tell me what works!

I will make a new CD for that site with the new AND old stuff, but I wanna feature just the formats that people USE. So tell me what you USE.

Formats currently offered are
Quicktime (MOV)
MPEG
RealMedia (RM, for RealPlayer)

Name your fave.

In article <0mq68.13563$Up4.975531@e3500-atl1.usenetserver.com> on alt.binaries.slack, Ned Wreck <NedWreck@usenetserver.com> asked this about the SubGenius video clips I've been posting:

> It's a well-known fact. I'm not ashamed of my ignorance at all.
> So, just how DO you view these .avi's and .mpg things, anyway?
>
> Ned
> The cheesiest

?? Same way you look at your PORNO!!

Don't you just... CLICK on them, and they jump off the screen and spring to life, play for about 10 seconds and then freeze up your computer?

Actually this posting of little videos has been really educational for me. I tended to assume that most people are like me when they get on the Internet -- that the first thing they did was learn how to get to the pornography. And that's an excellent technical training ground, because the pornographers have by far the best Internet tech and use the most advanced ways of getting dirty pictures out.

These files are all MOVIES, with soundtracks. Videos actually. On a regular Windows or Mac type home machine you would drag the file over to a video player program and then push the play button when you see a screen.

I had indeed assumed that all home computers nowadays come with video players.

However, little digital videos like this can be made in many ways, from very low-res to very high. But older machines can only play low-res videos. These are mostly upper-medium-res. Except the "RM" or RealPlayer files, they're very undemanding, if your gear can run RealPlayer at all.

My older Mac would choke on anything but low-res, small-screen size videos.

AVI is kind of a mostly-Windows video format. Thus still pretty common, especially among troglodytes and cave men

Quicktime (QT, or MOV) used to be more of a Mac thing, but actually it's sort of generic and underlies a lot of digital video.

MPEG is supposed to work on anything.

Windows Media or WMV is just another silly gates plot like that "Bob" operating system that no one used. They do tend to be SMALL and UGLY versions of a video.

RM only works in RealPlayer -- the ding-ee that plays radio on the Internet. It also plays TV in a grotty way.

I guess the QTVR files that have been posted by me and IMBJR on occasion must REALLY perplex some people.

When you're a Mac user like me, but don't want to look like a jerk, you have to learn all the formats for ALL the computer systems.

Windows users are the only ones who can act like jerks all the time, with impunity. On Mac or Unix you have to EARN impunity.

I have also been assuming that folks without ISDN, DSL or cable weren't downloading these giganto files at all.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

Wow! I guess I better delete all that bad Quicktime and RealPlayer
stuff in a hurry! It might hurt somebody!

I think you guys are wimps, for not being geeky enough.

Or maybe not being geeky enough makes you nerds. I'm not sure how the
jargon has shifted.

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
A subsidiary of:
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. / P.O. Box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com PRABOB
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

In article <rIJ68.10164$pb.1290@nwrddc01.gnilink.net>, Pater Nostril
<hotfoot@inamenospam.com> wrote:

> I have a puny 56k modem, but do on occasion download a large movie file.
> Thanks to the wonderful world of treasures to be found in the newsgroups I
> can watch & create all current media formats on my windoze based computer.
> mpeg2 is the route I think is best

About once in a blue moon I encounter an AVI that has some codec not
known to my collection, but for the most part I have been able to play
every one of the various formats out there.

My own big gripe is that there is still no DivX converter for Macs.
BUT! I JUST REMEMBERED -- AGAIN -- I now have a perfectly serviceable
Windows box too. HEH! I could spend days just filling that thing up
with proggies, to avoid thinkiing about immediate jobs... in fact...
don't I need to finish those two Hours of Slack? Thanks for reminding
me! (I'm attempting to mix, in equal portions, material from Susie's
show, the Lymph Node Institute show, the Puzzling Evidence and Philo
show, the ESO show and the revised Media Barrage 5. Oh yes, and Two
Beans' HORRIBLE HORRIBLE UGLY "MUSIC"!!!)

Jes' kiddin' Two Beans. I know, it's really THREE "HORRIBLES".

But I really am mixing it in, you PUNK!!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: prostata@bronze.coil.com (The Stinking Bishop Prostata Cantata MP)

In article <3C5BA378.C9FAD74D@sheayright.com>,
Artemia Salina <y2k@sheayright.com> wrote:
>
>Thanks for all the bandwidth, Prostata. I also occasionally stream HOS
>episodes from concourse.com.

you're welcome. I'm glad someone's enjoying it.

>
>I'm ok with MPEG2. I think that makes three votes for mpeg2 so far.

mpeg2 seems pretty good. quicktime works "ok" but not great for me. The only problem I have with mpeg files is the compression dammage.

--
-------
I have burped, farted, and sneezed at the same time, and I am still
alive. --Dan Povenmire, Los Angeles
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "nikolai kingsley" <nikolai@broadway.net.au>

>
> I think you guys are wimps, for not being geeky enough.
>
> Or maybe not being geeky enough makes you nerds. I'm not sure how the
> jargon has shifted.

i think "lazy bastard" is the expression you're looking for.

nikolai
---
i spent *minutes* looking for that divx codec
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

> mpeg2 seems pretty good. quicktime works "ok" but not great for me.
> The only problem I have with mpeg files is the compression dammage.

Yeah, everything looks like it has been sandpapered halfway -- they did
the coarse grain, but never got around to the fine grain polish.

One reason Quicktime is problematic for many people is that so many
different codecs can be (and are) applied to it, and if you don't
happen to have that codec you're fucked. For pros this flexibility is
necessary but MAN! -- I can see why people get frustrated with this zoo
of formats. There's an even more perplexing choice of bit rate delivery
speeds that the website editor has to think about, too.

To me, with MPEG you lose more in picture quality than you gain in file
smallness, as opposed to QT.

But another problem with QT is that every other old computer video game
automatically installs it on your system, and it's always an OLD
version that fucks up your new version. Blame that on the game makers.

QT itself will mess with your head when it decides it needs to be
replaced by a new version. It will keep trying to go fetch the upgrade
unles you hog-tie it.

When you get the upgrade, of course, you find that the GOOD upgrade
costs $30!! Or rather, it won't do all its tricks (like editing)
without a secret password registration number serial code chant.

But, I sure as hell don't know what I would do without it.

I still can't believe that ANY of this shit works, that huge heavy
airplanes can fly in the air without flapping their wings, etc.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

> i think "lazy bastard" is the expression you're looking for.
>

But that means pretty much the same thing as "SubGenius"!

Actually it's the Rewardian SubGenii, but that's over 90% of them.

I found a new way of looking at Emergentile and Rewardian SubGenii, as
Morlock and Eloi SubGenii, respectively.

There are always 10 times as many Eloi/Rewardians/Zebras as
Morlocks/Emergentiles/Lions, just as in nature there are 10 prey for
every single predator. The Emergentile or Morlock SubGenii, however,
SERVE and PROTECT the Eloi/Rewardians every bit as much as they exploit
them; either species would die out without the other.

But here's the nasty thing about RealPlayer. The bootleg copies don't
work for shit. You almost HAVE to use the legit version. That's how it
worked out for me, anyway. Might just be a Mac thing.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

In article <memi3a.ac1.ln@news.concourse.com>, The Stinking Bishop
Prostata Cantata MP <prostata@bronze.coil.com> wrote:

> mpeg2 seems pretty good. quicktime works "ok" but not great for me.
> The only problem I have with mpeg files is the compression dammage.

I will make you a new CD to replace the one that's up -- it'll have the
new animations AND most of what's on the current one, but only in two
formats, I guess MPEG2 and QT.

MPEG2 for its genericness, and QT for the highest quality.

I have not heard a single word in favor of Windows Media, nor of
RealMedia, but personally if it were just for me and my gear, it would
be QT and RM only.

Oh yeah, I keep forgetting DivX. I guess I need to spend half a day
fucking with getting a converter into this office PC I inherited. But
I'm afraid then I'll find out that it has to have some kind of "CARD"
or "DEAN MAN'S BRAIN" or other high ransom to run big videos. Then I'll
have to become yet ANOTHER kind of geek.

Maybe I should just say Fuck the Internet and get a videotape done,
then let the zoo keeper worry about it.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: prostata@bronze.coil.com (The Stinking Bishop Prostata Cantata MP)

In article <030220021359256351%stang@subgenius.com>,
Rev. Ivan Stang <stang@subgenius.com> wrote:

>
>I have not heard a single word in favor of Windows Media, nor of
>RealMedia, but personally if it were just for me and my gear, it would
>be QT and RM only.

Groovy. I'm watching Invader Zim right now in RM format.

>
>Oh yeah, I keep forgetting DivX. I guess I need to spend half a day
>fucking with getting a converter into this office PC I inherited. But
>I'm afraid then I'll find out that it has to have some kind of "CARD"
>or "DEAN MAN'S BRAIN" or other high ransom to run big videos. Then I'll
>have to become yet ANOTHER kind of geek.
>

I wasn't real impressed with DIVX, but then again I've only seen
one file. The compression was so poor that it gave me a headache after 10
minutes.

I like QT, but it the quicktime player seems unstable. I'm
guessing that's because it's mac software ported to windoze.

>Maybe I should just say Fuck the Internet and get a videotape done,
>then let the zoo keeper worry about it.

We need to find a DVD burner for you. Then you can say "fuck the
eennernet" and sell good quality video burned on demand like you do for
the CDs...

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

In article <nfpm3a.bka2.ln@news.concourse.com>, The Stinking Bishop
Prostata Cantata MP <prostata@bronze.coil.com> wrote:

>
>
> I wasn't real impressed with DIVX, but then again I've only seen
> one file. The compression was so poor that it gave me a headache after 10
> minutes.

Me too -- I watched EVOLUTION and TOMB RAIDER on my computer in that
format and there's a kind of COMPRESSION PULSATION (probably keyframing
related) that is indeed headache inducing.

BUT... you sure can cram a lot into a small space. It would be perfect
for ARISE, which is headache inducing in plain VHS form already.

>
> I like QT, but it the quicktime player seems unstable. I'm
> guessing that's because it's mac software ported to windoze.

Isn't there a main all-purpose Windows player that plays all formats?

Also, well hell I guess I could check this out -- doesn't Explorer play
QT movies? It sure does on a Mac. You have to have a plug-in but that
comes with Explorer, right?

The current Quicktime player on Macs will run damn near everything from
MP3 audio alone, to AVI and MPEG. Some things have to be imported and
converted before they'll play. It won't play Real Media files or
certain old timey WAVs.

The big prob with Quicktime for me was that they kept changing
versions, but game discs would install an OLD version which would fuck
everything up.

> We need to find a DVD burner for you. Then you can say "fuck the
> eennernet" and sell good quality video burned on demand like you do for
> the CDs...

My son has a burner and the "pro" version of the burner prog, and he
says they both have MAJOR bugs that are still being worked out. He's
heavily involved in computer video user groups and talks to Apple techs
all the time about incredibly complicated, tedious stuff.

I have a DVD player on my computer but I only have two movies
(PLANETARY TRAVELLERS the Bryce animation movie and THINGS TO COME),
which I have never watched all the way through.

The day I fonally go out and buy one of those $99 DVD players and hook
it up to me TV (which does have a surround sound system thanks to a
nearby garage sale) -- that's when i'll get all hot and bothered about
SubGenius DVDs.

My rule of thumb has been that the average SuBgenius is probably
roughly as broke as me and on roughly the same equipment level -- on
average.

Speaking of which, CONNIVIN' IVAN'S MEDIA SHACK at SubSITE now fills
orders THE VERY NEXT DAY! That's right, ONE DAY TURN-AROUND on ALL
media orders. (We are slow on the 4-X-Day shirts because they're still
in Dallas, but that's a kot point because there are ALMOST NONE LEFT!!)

DID YOU KNOW, weird music makers and mixicians out there, that the
revised CD versions of the old Media Barrage tapes are broken up in to
HUNDREDS OF COMPONENT TRACKS? (Well, dozens.) Making it SICKENINGLY
EASY to grab JOLTING SUBGENIUS RANT SAMPLES without tedious searching.
(And there's a LOG of the tracks on the inside FULL COLOR cover!)

JUST THINK -- all you need do is throw one or two rant clips over your
generic home-made computer generated tekno music and you'll be a FAMOUS
SUBGENIUS DOKTOR -- SUDDENLY! With almost NO WORK.

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
A subsidiary of:
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. / P.O. Box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com PRABOB
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Bryan J. Maloney" <bjm10@cornell.edu>

In article <060220021135097795%stang@subgenius.com>, "Rev. Ivan Stang"
<stang@subgenius.com> wrote:

> Me too -- I watched EVOLUTION and TOMB RAIDER on my computer in that
> format and there's a kind of COMPRESSION PULSATION (probably keyframing
> related) that is indeed headache inducing.

It might be card-mediated. I've never noticed this problem on my Winbox
(Phillips flat-screen monitor, Guillemot Maxi sumthinerother card.)
That's the problem with exceptionally efficient compression
algorithms--they rely heavily on the ability of the end-use machine to
uncompress.

> Isn't there a main all-purpose Windows player that plays all formats?

Nope, just an "all formats except QuickTime" player.

--
"A 'Cape Cod Salsa' just isn't right."
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: John Starrett <jstarret@carbon.cudenver.edu>

"Bryan J. Maloney" wrote:
<snip>

> > Isn't there a main all-purpose Windows player that plays all formats?
>
> Nope, just an "all formats except QuickTime" player.
>

Actually, IrfanView (freeware) plays all formats, but it uses the Quick
Time plugin to do .mov files. Nevertheless, it is nice to be able to
view *every* media type with the same viewer. It loads fast too. I am
watching Ed's Cat Herders on IrfanView as I write.

http://www.irfanview.com

John Starrett
"We have nothing to queer but the fairy stuff."
----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Bryan J. Maloney" <bjm10@cornell.edu>

In article <3C61857F.557A74C4@carbon.cudenver.edu>, John Starrett
<jstarret@carbon.cudenver.edu> wrote:

> Actually, IrfanView (freeware) plays all formats, but it uses the Quick
> Time plugin to do .mov files. Nevertheless, it is nice to be able to
> view *every* media type with the same viewer. It loads fast too. I am
> watching Ed's Cat Herders on IrfanView as I write.
>
> http://www.irfanview.com

This is how one can often learn about great software. Don't ask about
it, make a statement about how the software that one is looking for
simply doesn't exist. It is the nature of USENet that people will not
answer a question but will jump in to provide the very information that
would answer the question if by so doing they can contradict someone.

--
"A 'Cape Cod Salsa' just isn't right."


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