Dear dear SubGen police-induced demoralisation exprot
Correspondent:: "Rev. Simian"
Date: Fri, 19 Nov 2004 03:40:10 +0000
--------
Please.
Plain clothed bobby came round today to take a statement, as I'd
witnessed a violent incident the night before. My rendition of events
was somewhat confused, as I freely admitted, but this was understandable
due to various circumstances. But then he said "you also seem like a
confused person, sir" and voiced the opinion that a barrister might
'tear me to shreds' in court, due to my *essentially* bewildered nature.
Naturally, holding the opinion of a detective in Her Majesty's
Constabulary in the highest regard, I am a tad concerned. Should I see
someone about this?
--
Rev. Simian
Correspondent:: "nu-monet v7.0"
Date: Thu, 18 Nov 2004 21:21:49 -0700
--------
Rev. Simian wrote:
>
> "...you also seem like a confused person, sir..."
>
> Naturally, holding the opinion of a detective in
> Her Majesty's Constabulary in the highest regard,
> I am a tad concerned. Should I see someone about
> this?
>
Your axiom is flawed: instead you should ask
yourself, "Do I wish to be useful to the police?"
If the police see you as "useful", the only thing
it can lead to is them wanting to "use" you.
The problem here is to transcend your ego, to not
worry about appearing "useful" to them. To pretend
to be a fool so you don't end up a tool.
--
Unless there is some reason for investigation,
the federal law and the Constitution still
protect the rights of citizens.
--FBI agent Greg Stejskal
Correspondent:: "Rev. Simian"
Date: Fri, 19 Nov 2004 17:20:54 +0000
--------
The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new. nu-monet v7.0
sat down and wrote
>Rev. Simian wrote:
>>
>> "...you also seem like a confused person, sir..."
>>
>> Naturally, holding the opinion of a detective in
>> Her Majesty's Constabulary in the highest regard,
>> I am a tad concerned. Should I see someone about
>> this?
>>
>
>Your axiom is flawed: instead you should ask
>yourself, "Do I wish to be useful to the police?"
>
>If the police see you as "useful", the only thing
>it can lead to is them wanting to "use" you.
>
>The problem here is to transcend your ego, to not
>worry about appearing "useful" to them. To pretend
>to be a fool so you don't end up a tool.
Yup, but in this case I think I may have had evidence to help my
neighbour, who got a knife from his house when threatened by two young
hoodlums. It seemed like legitimate self-defence to me, but the police
here take can a dim view of such actions.
--
Rev. Simian
Correspondent:: "Kevin Cunningham"
Date: Fri, 19 Nov 2004 13:04:35 GMT
--------
"Rev. Simian" wrote in message
news:c$gpx9KasWnBFwn1@clara.net...
>
> Please.
>
> Plain clothed bobby came round today to take a statement, as I'd witnessed
> a violent incident the night before. My rendition of events was somewhat
> confused, as I freely admitted, but this was understandable due to various
> circumstances. But then he said "you also seem like a confused person,
> sir" and voiced the opinion that a barrister might 'tear me to shreds' in
> court, due to my *essentially* bewildered nature.
>
> Naturally, holding the opinion of a detective in Her Majesty's
> Constabulary in the highest regard, I am a tad concerned. Should I see
> someone about this?
>
> --
> Rev. Simian
I think you need to look at the same question from their side of the fence.
What would you be if the constable had known you would be a perfect witness?
A PINK!!!!!!!!!!!!
What you got was a complement, a great big wet kiss! He just about called
you a SuBgeNius. Thank the officer and ask to fornicate with his wife or him
or both depending on your needs.
Rev. Dr. Junior Mints
Anti-Pope of Atlanta
Correspondent:: "Rev. Simian"
Date: Fri, 19 Nov 2004 17:14:44 +0000
--------
The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new. Kevin
Cunningham sat down and wrote
>I think you need to look at the same question from their side of the
>fence. What would you be if the constable had known you would be a
>perfect witness?
>
>A PINK!!!!!!!!!!!!
EXACTLY! THAT'S THE ANSWER I WAS FISHING FOR!
And, what's more, it's TRUE!
>What you got was a complement, a great big wet kiss! He just about
>called you a SuBgeNius. Thank the officer and ask to fornicate with his
>wife or him or both depending on your needs.
Good idea! Thank you for your input, Dr. Mints. Then again, the cop was
about 6' 2" and built like a combine harvester - I might not be able to
be able to maintain an erection in those circumstances and he would feel
hurt and slighted and might lash out. Big lump of a man - he thought
Tanzania was in Australia for fuck's sake.
--
Rev. Simian
Correspondent:: nikolai kingsley
Date: Sat, 20 Nov 2004 16:13:48 +1100
--------
> Big lump of a man - he thought
> Tanzania was in Australia for fuck's sake.
it could very well be. hang on, and i'll have a quick look around.
Correspondent:: "Rev. Simian"
Date: Sat, 20 Nov 2004 21:04:50 +0000
--------
The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new. nikolai
kingsley sat down and wrote
>it could very well be. hang on, and i'll have a quick look around.
Hint - look south of Victoria for the female pubic area. Easy mistake to
make for your average dumb cop.
The filth have charged my neighbour with attempted murder cos he did
something with a knife, supposedly, according to these three young
hoodlums who were trying to steal a car. Plus they were Pakistani, and
are claiming a racial element to the case.
--
Rev. Simian
Correspondent:: urpansoph@aol.com (Ur Pansoph)
Date: 19 Nov 2004 18:45:35 GMT
--------
<<<< Naturally, holding the opinion of a detective in Her Majesty's
Constabulary in the highest regard, I am a tad concerned. Should I see someone
about this? >>
Yes, me. I will come to your house and administer
several personality tests during my stay. This may
take several weeks -- and I will be jaunting over to
the Pijp on the 26th -- but I will give you
three Jungian personality tests, the MBTI, a Kiersey
personality profile and my own PST (pansoph stress
test) which monitors your reaction as I smoke all
yer frappy and forget to clean my discarded pubic
hairs from your shower drain. Before I leave we
burn the results in your neighbor's backyard and
if he pulls a knife I'll tell the cops it was all my
fault and they'll deport me back to the US for free.
Correspondent:: nikolai kingsley
Date: Sat, 20 Nov 2004 16:10:21 +1100
--------
> Plain clothed bobby came round today to take a statement, as I'd
> witnessed a violent incident the night before. My rendition of events
> was somewhat confused, as I freely admitted, but this was understandable
> due to various circumstances. But then he said "you also seem like a
> confused person, sir" and voiced the opinion that a barrister might
> 'tear me to shreds' in court, due to my *essentially* bewildered nature.
this falls into the category of "things i wish i'd thought of saying an
hour after the event", but you might have fixed him with your steely
gaze and asked to see his psych credentials. since, as a rozzer, he's
probably a washout from the SAS, he would know as much about mental
health as a shithouse rat. tell him you'll report him for practicing
without a license. "why don't you go pound some ravers with your baton,
filth?" (pronounced "filf")
incidentally, it's not that he'd be in any trouble if you *did* report
him, but the thing police fear more than an antisocial falangist with a
bren gun, is PAPERWORK.
"A PILE OF CLAIMS!"
- Brenten, "Tank Police"
Correspondent:: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)
Date: 20 Nov 2004 16:51:55 GMT
--------
>Please.
>
>Plain clothed bobby came round today to take a statement, as I'd
>witnessed a violent incident the night before. My rendition of events
>was somewhat confused, as I freely admitted, but this was understandable
>due to various circumstances. But then he said "you also seem like a
>confused person, sir" and voiced the opinion that a barrister might
>'tear me to shreds' in court, due to my *essentially* bewildered nature.
>
>Naturally, holding the opinion of a detective in Her Majesty's
>Constabulary in the highest regard, I am a tad concerned. Should I see
>someone about this?
>
Yes, you need to see the locla Chemists for advice and legal counsil. Then
swing by the Tobacoists for additional Medical advice.
In the current situation, lots of people are diversifying their business to
protect their rate of return and equity.
By they way, are you going to get rid of Tony "The Poodle" any time soon?
MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man
"War hath no Fury like a non-combatants"
Charles E. Montague
Correspondent:: "Rev. Simian"
Date: Sat, 20 Nov 2004 20:46:58 +0000
--------
The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new. Rev. Richard
Skull sat down and wrote
>By they way, are you going to get rid of Tony "The Poodle" any time
>soon?
He's sort of a cross between a poodle and an attack dog. An attack
poodle. I'm not going to get rid of the slimy little fuck any time soon
as I don't like the idea of spending the rest of my life in clink.
Voting-wise the main alternative party is the Conservatives, who're even
worse. We're the 51st State, we're stuck with it, and so are you I'm
afraid.
--
Rev. Simian
Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Sun, 21 Nov 2004 21:51:50 -0800
--------
"Rev. Simian" wrote:
>
> Please.
>
> Plain clothed bobby came round today to take a statement, as I'd
> witnessed a violent incident the night before. My rendition of events
> was somewhat confused, as I freely admitted, but this was understandable
> due to various circumstances. But then he said "you also seem like a
> confused person, sir" and voiced the opinion that a barrister might
> 'tear me to shreds' in court, due to my *essentially* bewildered nature.
>
> Naturally, holding the opinion of a detective in Her Majesty's
> Constabulary in the highest regard, I am a tad concerned. Should I see
> someone about this?
>
It appears to me you just did.