BIZARRE NEWS (found on SubGenius Digest)

Date: Thu, 31 Oct 1996 03:00:09 -0600
From: owner-subgenius-digest@armchair.mb.ca
To: subgenius-digest@onramp.armchair.mb.ca
Subject: Subgenius Digest V6 #601

>>>Children Lift $10,000 From Bank
Source: AP
MIRANDA DE EBRO, Spain (10-23) -- Four sisters, aged 9 to
14, were arrested after grabbing $10,000 from the bank's vault.
Three of the sisters distracted Banco de Exterior employees
with questions about obtaining credit, while the youngest
slipped inside the vault and took $10,000 in cash. The sisters
were chased and apprehended a few minutes later, but the
money disappeared.
Police investigators suspect the girls might have passed the
money to a fifth person.

>>>Man Dies Despite Cautious Behavior
Source: Charlotte, NC - TV NEWS program
Submitted by: Neil A. Kornhauser
BUFFALO, NY (10-23) -- An unidentified man, who had too much
to drink, decided not to risk driving home. The man hailed a cab to
play it safe. While in the back seat of the taxi, the man died as a
result of an accident caused by a drunk driver who ran a red light.

>>>Dead Man Gets Circumcised
Source: AFP
NAIROBI, Kenya (10-28) -- Evading a local tradition during his
79-year-lifetime, a man was circumcised after his death. Villagers
in the western Vihiga district would not bury an uncircumcised
man, claiming it was a taboo to do so.
The man somehow escaped ritual circumcision in 1920, but could
not escape it after his death.
Circumcision is practiced among many ethnic groups in Kenya.

>>>Charity Rider Ends Up in Wheelchair
Source: AP
BOSTON (10-28) -- A man who was bicycling to raise money for
people with multiple sclerosis crashed in the back of a bus and
faces a lifetime in a wheelchair.
Wayne Ross, 30, was attempting a 16,000-mile bicycle trek from
Prudhoe Bay, Alaska, to Cape Horn, South America, to benefit
the Multiple Sclerosis Foundation.
"I was riding to raise money for people in wheelchairs," Ross said.
"It's kind of ironic that I end up in a wheelchair." The unfortunate
accident happened in Guatemala City the day after Ross had dinner with
the Guatemalan President Alvaro Arzu.

>>>Dog and Owner Arrested
Source: AFP
LIMA, Peru (10-26) -- Police raided three brothels as part of an
anti-AIDS campaign which resulted in the arrests of 12 prostitutes, 20
clients, and ONE DOG. Officers were shocked to find a pitbull terrier
quietly watching his owner's sexual activities with a local
prostitute. The owner claims he brought his pet to watch as a "new
experience." Both dog and owner were taken to jail.

>>>Woman Arrested after 16,000 Prank Calls
Source: UPI
TOKYO, (10-28) -- A Japanese woman was arrested after making
more than 16,000 prank calls to a man who refused to meet with
her to discuss an arranged marriage.
The woman told police that it is impolite to decline an arranged
marriage without coming for a face-to-face meeting.

>>>IN OTHER BIZARRE NEWS:

+++TEHRAN, Iran (Reuter, 10-24) -- Authorities found a man who
has lived as a caveman for the last 30 years. Although he lost most of
his ability to speak, he was able to tell welfare workers that he
decided to live in a cave after his wife left him.
+++BEIJING (Reuter,10-28) -- Beijing city officials have declared November 12 as
"Official Rat-Killing Day." Thousand of citizens are expected to roam
the city hunting down the problem rats. (1996 is the Year of the Rat
under the Chinese lunar calendar)
+++BOGOTA (Reuter, 10-27) --Colombia is the kidnapping country of the world.
More than 45 percentof the world's kidnappings take place in this country.
A new releasedstudy points out that someone is abducted every two and 1/2 hours.
+++LIMA (Reuters, 10-24) -- Police intercepted a 440 pounds (200 kg)
drug shipment which contained a Voodoo doll representing a policeman
with his hands tied, eyes shut and nails stuck to his body. Milanio
Vargas said the doll was his "insurance" against being caught.
+++BOGOTA (Reuter, 10-24) -- Airport police arrested a woman who tried
boarding a plane to Rome and was carrying 2.2 pounds (1 kg.) of
cocaine in a helmet-like device. The helmet was covered with a wig and
glued to her scalp.
+++TEGUCIGALPA, Honduras (Reuter, 10-23) -- In an
attempt to promote safe sex, authorities will distribute condoms along
with voting material in preparation for the primary-style elections.
+++DAMAM, UAE (Bangkok Post,10-17) submitted by Patrick Gallagher -- A
Saudi woman complained of "strange movements down her back" during a
plane flight to see her daughter. At her destination, the daughter
pulled back the folds of her mother's dress to take a look, and was
bitten by a poisonous viper snake. The girl died.

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