Re: The Ginger/Mary Ann Debate Comes to alt.slack!

From: lyonderboy@hotmail.com (Lupus Yonderboy)
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Wed, Oct 17, 2001 10:43 AM

"The Rev. Dr. Lt. Chaos Israel" <walker555@MailAndNews.com> wrote in message news:<3BCC62F2@MailAndNews.com>...
> June Cleaver.

I don't know.
Whichever one that's willing to give me a rim job.

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From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

Like most SubGenii, I was a Mary Ann man. Ginger just seemed too
"plastic" and wore too much make-up. Mary Ann seemed more real, more
like somebody you could actually fuck.

But I CHANGED. I am now a whole-hearted and hole-brained GINGER MAN.
(Yeah, yeah, ha ha.) Think about it -- wasn't Mary Ann always CONCERNED
about something? Always the "RATIONAL" one, the "CONSCIENCE" of the
castaways?

The girl your MOM would have wanted you going out with?

How much actual FUN did you see Mary Ann having?

Ginger, on the other hand -- sure, she's dumb as a box of broken
hammers, but SINCE WHEN IS "INTELLIGENCE" A PLUS AMONG THE YETINSYNY??

She was ALWAYS pleasant and ALWAYS "game." Completely unjudgemental --
very innocent in fact. FUN.

And whereas Ginger is PLAINLY a swallower, any blow job you DID get
from Mary Ann would probably come with a price attached somehow. She'd
see it as an OBLIGATION.

If you rattled on about, oh, I dunno, monster movies, or politics, to
Mary Ann, she'd get bored quick and change the subject. Ginger, though,
would just look at you in gape-jawwed wonder/hypnosis while idly
rubbing your crotch as you blabbed idiotically. Let's face it, neither
one of them is exactly Connieite material, but if you're gonna be stuck
on a deserted island with a dumb broad, why not make it the BONOBO dumb
broad.

FIRST THINGS FIRST, after all. I wouldn't put either ONE of them in
charge of the water purification tablets, that's for sure.

If you're over 40, Mrs. Howell doesn't look that bad... her bod is
actually pretty good, what one can see of it, and rich people are often
able to stay relatively young looking, especially if they're as vapid
as she is. And they're decadent. Her hairdo sure is "Grandma," though,
that'd be my biggest problem with her.

Ginger for sure. Just grab her ears like jug handles and GO AT that
empty head 5 times a day. Nothing else to do but break open coconuts.
Munch that red rug every time you get thirsty. You gonna be there for a
LONG TIME, boy.

"...For a three hour tour... a *THREE HOUR TOUR*."

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Subject: Re: The Ginger/Mary Ann Debate Comes to alt.slack!
From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>

Being a high-bandwidth type individual, then, you
should be interested in knowing that someone is posting
a rare Gilligan's Island pilot, with a DIFFERENT Mary Ann
*and* Professor, on alt.binaries.multimedia

This still goes back to my theory that it was all a
set-up job for the perverted tastes of Thurton
Howell III. Think about it: why would a billionaire
like Howell get on a puny little tour boat, when with
a snap of his finger he could get an aircraft carrier
to take him out for free?

You just know that he spends all his time in the
island's underground facility, spying on the orgy
through hidden cameras, while his staff creates
stuff like bicycle-powered satellite transducers made
from coconut shells.

He is the master of the island. There he is a GOD.

--
*
Moesha seizes a fresh slice of chef Elise's
greasy fish quiche and mischievously mashes
and squishes it on the Joseph piece of the
fascist police chief's cheezy French crèche.
*
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From: inigo@montoya.net (D. P. Roberts)

In that pilot, the girl's name was "Bunny" but I don't know what the
Professor was called. I won a radio contest years ago because I knew
that Gilligan's first name was "Willy".

Mary Ann - 53 votes
Ginger - 2 votes

Note to Kevan: That's as it should be, because Mary Ann is a
wholesome, white Kansas girl, and Ginger is obviously some sort of
mixed breed. (haw haw haw haw)
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From: SubGenius Spice <SubGeniusSpice@jbeyqarg.ngg.arg>

>In that pilot, the girl's name was "Bunny" but I don't know what the
>Professor was called. I won a radio contest years ago because I knew
>that Gilligan's first name was "Willy".

willy gilligan?

wasn't he one of the pioneers of skiffle music?
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From: opalpeacok@aol.com.de.it (Salacia the Overseer)
Newsgroups: alt.slack

>Mary Ann - 53 votes
>Ginger - 2 votes
>

I was going to stay out of this last week, but I broke.
Ginger, for taking all of her Saturday night best on a three hour tour.
Especially that shimmery gold cocktail gown.
If I was a man I'd be a drag queen.

Headmiftreff falacia the Overfeer
Branch falacians
Director of Programming, Keeper of the feven fqueals, Hainted, Tainted, & Befet
by Devylf
Dia de lof Muertof Fiefta Oct 27, 2001-Chicago Athenaeum
http://www.members.aol.com/opalpeacok/TheCompound.html
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From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

In article <3bd1c5e1.1916647@news.earthlink.net>, D. P. Roberts
<inigo@montoya.net> wrote:

> Note to Kevan: That's as it should be, because Mary Ann is a
> wholesome, white Kansas girl, and Ginger is obviously some sort of
> mixed breed. (haw haw haw haw)

NO!! Mary Ann, while mainly Caucasian obviously, is fairly dark skinned
and could easily be part American Indian! Ginger, on the other hand, is
so made up that you can't tell WHAT she is. Since Gilligan's Island is
really a set in Hollywood, she MIGHT be... JEWISH. Might even be
related to my beloved, Tori Spelling. But judging strictly from the
visible evidence, I would place Ginger's race as "Floozish".

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
A subsidiary of:
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. / P.O. Box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com PRABOB
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From: "Ricky Nielsen" <rickyn@lor.net>

actually the best bet would be to send the Skipper,Gilligan, professor and
Mr. Howell off on some fools erran and grap up Ginger<Maryann< and Mrs.
Howell and see if ya'll could come up sith some never before seen on this
planet positions I gots several in mind as we speak

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Original file name: Re- The Ginger/Mary Ann Debate - converted on Thursday, 20 December 2001, 03:25