A VISION by Dr. G. Gordon Gordon

From: friday@cybercom.net (Friday Jones)

In article <4vdfmu$hv2@nntp-1.io.com>, gggor@io.com (gg gordon) wrote:

> 1. Last night I had a vision of Dobbs. I saw him and the Fightin' Jesus and
> their guns were slick and oiled.
> 2. Yea! I saw them stand shoulder to shoulder with the Battling Buddha,
> Killer Krishna and the clones of Elvis and J.F.K. against a vast PinkTide.
> 3. And as the glorpish masses moved relentlessly forward I watched our team
> lock and load, drawing a most puissant collective bead on the PinkMeat
> Masses.
> 4. And then in a stream of fire, smoke and leaden death did they smite
> these unbelievers with the full metal jacketed gospel of Dobbs!
> 5. With hot lead like a living wall of death were these infidels smitten!
> 6. The Pink Herd, False Profits, the Clones of Majestyk 12 and the Minions
> of Weishaupt and Elron fell like new-mown hay before the scythes of the
> planet cleansing Missionaries and their Cohorts of Conspiracy trembled like
> the leaves of the high Aspen tree and were troubled in their putrescent
> hearts.
> 7. And it came to pass that the streets of the Celestial City ran red with
> the blood of the unbelievers while the Forces of Dobbs smote them and
> slew them until their guns shone red with the glow of righteous
> retribution!
> 8. Side by side and shoulder to shoulder they stood, Smiting, Singing and
> Smiling with Salvation on their side as they slew the unbelieving masses.
> 9. And it came to pass that this battle lasted not for hours nor even days
> but almost a full month!
> 10. And even as THEY quailed before the awesome power of "Bob", the
> Soldiers of Slack were strong and ferocious like lions in the days of
> old.
> 11. And the sky was black with the smoke of burning flesh and the sun was
> darkened for these last days, the Armageddon of the End Times.
> 12. Behold! Within this awesome, frightful vision I perceived the strangest
> and most wondrous sight of all.
> 13. For, did not Nhee Ghee Himself in all his awful splendor ride forth to
> join with the forces of "Bob".
> 14. And Dobbs himself smiled as he watched that dark spirit load his mighty
> weapons.
> 15. And at the stroke of the witching hour came a brief respite in the
> gruesome battle and "Bob" confronted Nh**Gh** and demanded to know what
> sort of double-dealing was the evil setting in motion by fighting against
> and slaying those very forces he usually abetted and delighted in.
> 16. And Nh**Gh** smiled most unwholesomely and then did say: "I don't play
> no favorites Pipefaced One, and if THEY and THEIR minions prevail, who
> then shall I have the true pleasure of TORMENTING...these guys ain't no
> fun at all!"
> 17. And "Bob" saw and understood once again and anew that truly Nobody knew
> the Nothingness of Nh**Gh**!
> 18. And Dobbs smiled and presented unto The Living Chaos a sacred
> seven-bladed windbreaker and when the fearsome battle renewed the Forces
> of Slack did prevail and ride triumphant over the forces of the PNKZ and
> Mediocretins and thus was the True Integrity of the Sacred Stone MWOWM
> preserved!

(Sniff) that was ... was ... so _beautiful_! (Bawl)
And to think I'd almost forgotten the real taste of alt.slack's Slack, had
almost turned my back on this path that bears so many Pink footsteps and
yet, shining among, those few marks of Yetisyny!
PRaiSE "BOB"!!!! (Or he'll "Bob" you out, man! He'll "Bob" you out!)

- The Irreverend Friday Jones

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