Nenslo and Iceknife have been talking a lot lately about feelings and
emotions and compassion, and I think that's just super. But doesn't it
all come down to oral sex in the end? I mean -- much like rock and
stick are the fundamentals of tools, oral sex is the basic driving force
that causes people to be nice to one another, because you can FORCE
yourself on the vagina or penis, but you're partner has to really WANT
to use the mouth (plus they could really hurt you if you tried to force
it -- the human jaw is really strong). Thus you have to learn to be
nice if you're going to get any.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Isn't it all about oral sex, really?
From: kevbob@ecsis.net (kevbob)
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Sun, Mar 12, 2000 1:39 AM
Message-ID: <scmetr58a5n146@corp.supernews.com>
magdalen@subgenius.com (Rev. Magdalen) posted to alt.slack on Sun, 12
Mar 2000 06:27:39 GMT with <38CB390A.D2033181@home.com>
> Thus you have to learn to be nice if you're going to get
>any.
what does it mean when you are nice and people just look at you funny?
--
"stop talking to yourself.
you don't like you any better
than anyone else who knows you."
-ICEKNIFE
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Isn't it all about oral sex, really?
From: ePRONO <nenslo@subgenius.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Sun, Mar 12, 2000 3:45 AM
Message-ID: <38CB5927.29DD@subgenius.com>
that's because YOU SUCK
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Isn't it all about oral sex, really?
From: Unit 4 <UnitIV@SPUTUM.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Reply-To: unit4@sputum.com
Date: Sun, Mar 12, 2000 4:12 AM
Message-ID: <mqnmcsspoeosohksg5ogv6kq4jd3ja4vtl@4ax.com>
On Sun, 12 Mar 2000 06:39:55 GMT, kevbob@ecsis.net (kevbob) wrote, in
alt.slack:
}magdalen@subgenius.com (Rev. Magdalen) posted to alt.slack on Sun, 12
}Mar 2000 06:27:39 GMT with <38CB390A.D2033181@home.com>
}
}> Thus you have to learn to be nice if you're going to get
}>any.
}
}what does it mean when you are nice and people just look at you funny?
That depends.
Funny ha-ha, funny strange, or funny sick?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Isn't it all about oral sex, really?
From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Reply-To: like.excess@sex.org
Date: Sun, Mar 12, 2000 9:54 AM
Message-ID: <38CBAF8C.1DF2@succeeds.com>
kevbob wrote:
>
> magdalen@subgenius.com (Rev. Magdalen) posted to alt.slack on Sun, 12
> Mar 2000 06:27:39 GMT with <38CB390A.D2033181@home.com>
>
> > Thus you have to learn to be nice if you're going to get
> >any.
>
> what does it mean when you are nice and people just look at you funny?
>
It means that you have do be nice for a while before you stick
your dick out at them. If you just smile at someone and stick
your dick out, it only works occassionally. It also helps if
you do it in context for oral sex. For example, if you stick
out your dick at a window at the DMV, it usually won't work.
The best trick is to be giving *them* oral sex, and when they're
starting to enjoy it, maneuver your sex parts so they wave
conspicuously in their face. However, you may choose not to
do this, as the decline of the American educational system
has also affected instruction in how to give oral sex. Most
schools would consider it an "elective". They might try to
stick your dick in their ear, or up their nose, or something.
You should also remember, that, even under the best of
circumstances, oral sex is still a lot like being attacked
by a giant snail.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Isn't it all about oral sex, really?
From: Legume <legume@subgenius.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Sun, Mar 12, 2000 2:55 PM
Message-ID: <38CBF61A.5951@subgenius.com>
Rev. Magdalen wrote:
>
> Nenslo and Iceknife have been talking a lot lately about feelings and
> emotions and compassion, and I think that's just super. But doesn't it
> all come down to oral sex in the end? I mean -- much like rock and
> stick are the fundamentals of tools, oral sex is the basic driving force
> that causes people to be nice to one another, because you can FORCE
> yourself on the vagina or penis, but you're partner has to really WANT
> to use the mouth (plus they could really hurt you if you tried to force
> it -- the human jaw is really strong). Thus you have to learn to be
> nice if you're going to get any.
Very true Magdalen, and also covered under the Rock and Stick teachings.
Rock and Stick are more than merely LITERAL tools, they are also
METAPHORICAL tools.
The tools needed to obtain oral sex from your partner are Rock and
Stick. You must be able to comprehend WHICH rock and WHICH stick is
appropriate to the job at hand.
In some cases, the only Rock and Stick you need are a twenty-dollar bill
and the guts to ask that hooker on the street. In other cases, the rocks
and sticks you have to use are guile and alcohol.
If you're truly serious about getting REALLY GOOD oral sex, the rock and
stick you need are charm, patience, and the willingness to GIVE good
oral sex.
At that point you and your partner BECOME the Rock and Stick, each of
you willing to become the tool needed to pleasure the other.
-----= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =-----
http://www.newsfeeds.com - The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World!
-----== Over 80,000 Newsgroups - 16 Different Servers! =-----
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Isn't it all about oral sex, really?
From: sternodox@aristotle.net (Sterno)
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Sun, Mar 12, 2000 3:13 PM
Message-ID: <sternodox-1203001417360001@pm11ppp105.aristotle.net>
In article <38CBF61A.5951@subgenius.com>, Legume <legume@subgenius.com> wrote:
> Rev. Magdalen wrote:
> >
> > Nenslo and Iceknife have been talking a lot lately about feelings and
> > emotions and compassion, and I think that's just super. But doesn't it
> > all come down to oral sex in the end? I mean -- much like rock and
> > stick are the fundamentals of tools, oral sex is the basic driving force
> > that causes people to be nice to one another, because you can FORCE
> > yourself on the vagina or penis, but you're partner has to really WANT
> > to use the mouth (plus they could really hurt you if you tried to force
> > it -- the human jaw is really strong). Thus you have to learn to be
> > nice if you're going to get any.
>
> Very true Magdalen, and also covered under the Rock and Stick teachings.
> Rock and Stick are more than merely LITERAL tools, they are also
> METAPHORICAL tools.
>
> The tools needed to obtain oral sex from your partner are Rock and
> Stick. You must be able to comprehend WHICH rock and WHICH stick is
> appropriate to the job at hand.
>
> In some cases, the only Rock and Stick you need are a twenty-dollar bill
> and the guts to ask that hooker on the street. In other cases, the rocks
> and sticks you have to use are guile and alcohol.
>
> If you're truly serious about getting REALLY GOOD oral sex, the rock and
> stick you need are charm, patience, and the willingness to GIVE good
> oral sex.
>
> At that point you and your partner BECOME the Rock and Stick, each of
> you willing to become the tool needed to pleasure the other.
Of course, all that is assuming that one's partner is ALIVE.
- Sterno
--
M'muh!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Isn't it all about oral sex, really?
From: kevbob@ecsis.net (kevbob)
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Sun, Mar 12, 2000 3:38 PM
Message-ID: <sco01g7pa5n106@corp.supernews.com>
wwww@wwww.www (leerroy@sphitz.com) posted to alt.slack on Mon, 12 Mar
1900 15:35:00 GMT with <8agdll$trk$1@slb0.atl.mindspring.net>
>Or you could just use the line that RARELY fails: Hey! You got a
>REAL pertty mouth! Huh Huh!
>Now SQUEAL like a pig fer me!
>(Works better in heavily wooded areas.)
wow.
i'd never thought of it in that context before,
but now that i do,
that _totally_ explains the clearcutting of northern wisconsin's woodlands
in the early part of the 20th century.
nifty.
--
"stop talking to yourself.
you don't like you any better
than anyone else who knows you."
-ICEKNIFE
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Isn't it all about oral sex, really?
From: "Rev. Magdalen" <magdalen@home.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Reply-To: magdalen@subgenius.com
Date: Sun, Mar 12, 2000 9:56 PM
Message-ID: <38CC593C.738DD9CB@home.com>
kevbob wrote:
>
> magdalen@subgenius.com (Rev. Magdalen) posted to alt.slack on Sun, 12
> Mar 2000 06:27:39 GMT with <38CB390A.D2033181@home.com>
>
> > Thus you have to learn to be nice if you're going to get
> >any.
>
> what does it mean when you are nice and people just look at you funny?
You need a bath. And SHAVE those things if you're gonna wave em around.
>
> --
> "stop talking to yourself.
> you don't like you any better
> than anyone else who knows you."
> -ICEKNIFE
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Isn't it all about oral sex, really?
From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Reply-To: like.excess@sex.org
Date: Tue, Mar 14, 2000 10:46 AM
Message-ID: <38CE5EED.3A69@succeeds.com>
Rev. Knezek wrote:
>
> nu-monet wrote:
>
> > kevbob wrote:
> > >
> > > magdalen@subgenius.com (Rev. Magdalen) posted to alt.slack on Sun, 12
> > > Mar 2000 06:27:39 GMT with <38CB390A.D2033181@home.com>
> > >
> > > > Thus you have to learn to be nice if you're going to get
> > > >any.
> > >
> > > what does it mean when you are nice and people just look at you funny?
> > >
> >
> > It means that you have do be nice for a while before you stick
> > your dick out at them. If you just smile at someone and stick
> > your dick out, it only works occassionally. It also helps if
> > you do it in context for oral sex. For example, if you stick
> > out your dick at a window at the DMV, it usually won't work.
> >
> > The best trick is to be giving *them* oral sex, and when they're
> > starting to enjoy it, maneuver your sex parts so they wave
> > conspicuously in their face. However, you may choose not to
> > do this, as the decline of the American educational system
> > has also affected instruction in how to give oral sex. Most
> > schools would consider it an "elective". They might try to
> > stick your dick in their ear, or up their nose, or something.
> >
> > You should also remember, that, even under the best of
> > circumstances, oral sex is still a lot like being attacked
> > by a giant snail.
>
> Either you have a REALLY bizarre snail fetish, or someone hasn't been doing
> it right, you poor thing.
> --
HEY, HEY, HEY! I'll let you know RIGHT NOW that having snail sex,
or "snex", as Donald Trump calls it, is not "bizarre". It is
the preferred sex of the elite.
Whether it is the Traditional New England Giant Rock Snail, favored
by such elite individuals as Edward Kennedy, Pierre Trudeau, and
the intelligensia of the more fashionable parts of Manhattan; or
the West Coast Scene 'Enormous Motherfucker' Banana Slugs, some
of the finer of which are raised by conniseuse like Barbara
Steisand and Madonna; you can be sure that IT'S THE BEST SEX YOU
WILL EVER GET (this side of a prarie squid, but, no telling.)
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: REPOST: Re: Isn't it all about oral sex, really?
From: friday@fridayjones.com (Friday Jones)
Newsgroups: alt.slack,alt.friday
Date: Fri, Mar 17, 2000 6:52 AM
Message-ID: <friday-ya02408000R1703000752540001@news.tiac.net>
In article <4$-_$-%$%%_--%__-$@news.noc.cabal.int>, like.excess@sex.org wrote:
>You should also remember, that, even under the best of
>circumstances, oral sex is still a lot like being attacked
>by a giant snail.
That IS the best of circumstances!
Oooh, wave those eyestalks THIS way, "Bob"!
--
Eternal salvation or TRIPLE your money back!
www.subgenius.com
Original file name: Isn't it all about oral sexŠ
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