|$20.95||The Book of the SubGenius|
The "Sistine Chapel" of the 20th Century, this profusely illustrated, softbound Horror Bible, published by Simon & Schuster, is now in its 17th printing. You'll never have to read another book as long as you live -- because you'll just sit, reading this one over and over again. 200 pages of brain-raping text and graphics. A self-help book for sinners, creeps, morphodites, and all wise persons and guys who knew they wouldn't get "help" from any book even if they needed it in the first place.
Encompasses Life of "Bob," his prophecy, entire past and future history of Earth, and all the instructions you'll ever need for survival, Slack, psychic wealth and prosperity in The End Times.
You will then learn that no matter how sure of things you thought you were, you were DEAD WRONG and GROVELING in an ILLUSION manufactured by the "Authorities" who secretly LORD OVER your VERY MIND. After that, you cannot continue to live in blithering normalcy -- you'll know what you're being fattened for. The book to go buy.
ALL COPIES BOUGHT HERE ARE SIGNED AND DATED BY REV. IVAN STANG.
|$17.95||Eyelash by Rev. Nikolai Kingsley|
THE FIRST SUBGENIUS SCIENCE FICTION NOVEL!
He swore he'd never deal with the aliens again, but here he was, letting them beam him onboard…
He promised that whatever they were planning he'd keep Tai out of it, but here she was, on the bridge...
What were the Xists trying to hide that was worse than Soul Harvesting and interstellar drug running, and why were they being so nice to him... at first?
WHAT IN THE NAME OF SLACK HAD J. R. “BOB” DOBBS GOTTEN HIM INTO?!?
A tale of paranoia, misdirection, outright lies, extremely angry robots and purple-haired elf girls, set in the richly detailed mythos of The Church of the SubGenius.
GUARANTEED DOCTRINALLY CORRECT
“Kingsley’s writing easily equals that of the giants on whose shoulders we crouch, holding on for dear life with white knuckles to the oversized weave of their immense dandruff-dusted sweaters while they stride about their titanic world.” — Rev. Ivan Stang
(Amazon also sells it, with a free preview of the first chapter. But Rev. Kingsley and the Church make more when you buy it from us.)
231-page trade paperback
|$14.99||Neighborworld by Lonesome Cowboy Dave DeLuca|
A bulldada science fiction novel by Lonesome Cowboy Dave DeLuca, the astounding improvisational wizard of The Church of the SubGenius radio show, The Hour of Slack. A little bit A CLOCKWORK ORANGE, a taste of The Firesign Theatre, a dab of Fleischer Brothers cartoons, a dash of Kafka, a splash of Fellini, and a whole fistful of Lonesome Cowboy Dave!
218-page trade paperback
Pamphlet #1: The power-packed introductory propaganda barrage that started it all. So dense with info that many persons have gotten lost in it FOREVER! Guaranteed to shock, enrapture, confuse, enlighten or piss off depending on which category you happen to fall into.
Pamphlet #2: Dozens Gave Their Words for this. Reveals proven success formula. Sued twice for blasphlegmy - AND LOST!! All-pulp chassis is flexible yet resilient... no more difficult de-spunking. Encrusted spum comes off as fast as it got on, with a simple dishrag. Acid-free coating is resistant to normalcy viruses.
|ALL GONE||REVELATION X||SOLD OUT - OUT OF PRINT|
The 1995 sequel to The Book of the SubGenius, the Last New Testament, HAS BEEN REPRINTED! Either the greatest general satire of pure human stupidity and greed ever created, or a self-help book from Hell, REVELATION X is darker, deeper, more detailed, louder and funnier than The Book of the SubGenius.
This HUGE tome of PURE DOCTRINAL RANTING and HIGH-POWERED GRAPHICS is so utterly and relentlessly TRUE and SLACK-IMBUED that old-time SubGenii, and newcomers alike, will laugh 'till their guts bleed and befoul their pants in sheer astonishment. God's Answer to Fundamentalists -- shove this book into ANY orifice and watch it GO!
OUT OF PRINT -- same story as THE BOBLIOGRAPHON, below
OUT OF PRINT
|THE SUBGENIUS PSYCHLOPAEDIA OF SLACK - THE BOBLIOGRAPHON|
NYES! A THIRD SUBGENIUS TESTAMENT! The NEW (Oct. 2006) encyclopedia of abnormality — 240 pages of cornea-melting illustrations and newly-released SubGenius writings that will SHOCK those who thought surely everything must be contained within the previous books. All-new revelations re: the Mystery of X-Day; Connie Dobbs; Subicide; Slack Magic; SubGenius Kooks; “Bob’s” Dark Secrets; The Earth-Mars Switch and infinitely more! From mighty Thunder’s Mouth/Avalon.
Size: 7" x 9" Weight 13 oz
Contents: WRITTEN: Ivan Stang 44%, Nenslo 14%, Onan Canobite 8%, Philo Drummond, G.G. Gordon, Dr. Hal, Susie the Floozy ~4 % each, 45 others <2% each. GRAPHICS: LeMur 18%, Heart Ignition 18%, IMBJR 9%, Nenslo 7%, Espira 4%, Stang 5%, Hellswami Satellite Weavers 3%, Atom Funway 3%. Ignatz Topolino 1%, Hal Robins 3%, 49 others ~1% each
Calories 100 From Fat 50
"... A lousy piece of lousy crappy crap..." -- Nenslo
"A rip-roaring rollercoaster of a read!" -- Publisher's Weekly
"...(written by) brain damaged retarded moron drug addicts ON DRUGS..." -- Nenslo
"A rollicking page-turner from cover to cover!" -- Wired
"Halfwit jackass bastards will JUST LOVE it." -- Nenslo
"Brilliant satire... threaded with true wisdom!" -- People
"Use it for toilet paper!" -- Nenslo
WHOOPS! SOLD OUT and OUT OF PRINT. The last 27 copies are preserved in the vaults for 25 years to be sold for one million dollars apiece. Or maybe we'll self-publish it.
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