And what a fine Saturday morning it is. The rails met in the middle of Kansas last night at about 3 am. Alt.slack from the West met alt.slack from the North and... OH SHIT!!! IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ALT.SLACK EAST!!!

Oh well, nobody'll be able to tell the difference.

I think I may need Macintosh zombies to chop the long headers out of the newer thousand items, though. I can't find a way that NewsWatcher will save posts with just Subject and Name... it seems to insist on nabbing the whole damned thing. So there's robot labor to be done in Word 4.0 for the Mac.

You wouldn't believe how fast I got at making those cuts, assigning the Subject "HEADING LEVEL #2" status and moving it to the top... the "outline" feature in MS Word is truly a wonderful thing. It's that feature which is integral to the success of the engineering feat.

But what I forgot to say last post was THE SUBGENIUS FOUNDATION WAS GIVEN A PHOTOCOPIER! A real nice one, that does reductions and enlargements. The document feed is screwed up but what the heck. No more trips to Mail Boxes Plus for Will O'Dobbs, me, or any of the other Bombies. We can't exactly print Stark Fists on it, but it'll be good for tape logs, form letters, artful experimentation, and xeroxes of people's butts.

My old Pappy, a minister in this Church as well as various secret Masonic and military ones, just retired last month, closed down his little law office, and GAVE US OUTRIGHT that very selfsame mighty machine that had been used to make all the safety copies of the art for Rev-X. (Quite contrary to poor old deranged Bob Black's "accusations" , my dad is not a rich high-powered corporate lawyer from an old-money family at all. Although I kinda wish he was. When they lived in the city, he represented various small trucking firms and soda bottling plants. For the last 20 years he's been a small-town all-purpose lawyer, getting poebucker kids out of jail, etc. He and the rest of my immediate family raise cattle (like 100 or so at a time) and grow hay. My brother is an actual for-real cowboy. What Black envisions as limos and Cadillacs are really pick-ups, a tractor and a little weird bulldozer used to clear cedar trees and dig "cow tanks." Just so you know. All of us Stangs have had to work for a living our whole lives. But if we WERE rich fucks, I certainly wouldn't be ASHAMED of it ANYWAY!)

But I don't want to think about Bob Black on such a FINE FINE DAY.

And on top of being able to show stalwart Will to his xerox machine in the garage this fine fine morning, Sister Tarla sent us a BIG BAG Of MEGAWARHEADS in ALL FLAVORS, just in the very nick of time! How SWEET! I mean HOW SOUR!! And she enclosed her BOOK OF SEXY POEMS with cool pictures of her paintings on the cover. It's downright skwishy around here. In fact -- get this --

I would say that the only possible drawback I can forsee for this FINE FINE DAY is that my wife is going to MAKE me go see THE BRIDGES OF MADISON COUNTY with her.

The things I do.


Well, I did that. I must say, it's one of those few cases where the movie CANNOT POSSIBLY be worse than the book. (The moral of the movie, incidentally, is, "DON'T MARRY A HUMAN.") They did manage to make Meryll Streep look DAMNED HOT (!!). The farm wife you'd most want to bend over the kitchen table and TIME YOUR THRUSTS TO THE BANGING OF THE KITCHEN DOOR IN THE WIND with. Or something like that.

Now it's Sunday. Had to do various personal duties... drove 200 miles this morning to rescue my daughter from yet ANOTHER weird religious cult (I get so tired of that)... spent about 3 hours today showing my wife Internet stuff on her computer -- the difference between email, newsgroups, and the Web, then helped her make her own list of newsgroups -- teacher and gardening and theater stuff. If I can just get her "hooked" on ONE NEWSGROUP, perhaps she'll hole up in her room with her computer and let me FINISH MY EXPERIMENTS IN PEACE!!! Without all this SKWISHY STUFF. Unfortunately, K12.chat.teachers and rec.gardening were looking pretty dull, and the teacher stuff on the Web that we found at random was mostly giant energy consortiums offering teachers cheap posters about The Wonders of Coal and the Marvels of Nuclear Energy and so on. Nevertheless, instructing amateurs in Internet stuff is always a great joy. I can almost feel the THRUMMING in my veins of the REWARD which the great spider will FEED ME for bringing her ANOTHER POTENTIAL EGG-SAC.

Finally I checked my email. There're about 60 stacked up now. Man, I must be one rude guy. I can't answer any of it until Tuesday. I have to "work" again tomorrow on another video. But I did read one from Purple boy saying ha, ha, he heard from somebody who said that Nelson Thall (producer of the Canadian False Bob CDs) was gonna sue ME over something I said about him in an article in a Dallas paper, The Met... that was fixing to bum me out, but I looked at the Met article, and it didn't MENTION Nelson Thall! I refered to the CD and a guy who calls himself Bob Dobbs, but that's all... but at this point, NOTHING would surprise me.

So I never did get to look at alt.slack again. Nor did I finish the Stark Fist. And I only returned two phone calls. But I DID get the ASSEMBLY LINE BUILT. Come Tuesday, when I finish the video editing job, I can switch it on, and start the robots to building more robots.

**WOW!!*** Rev. David McConville from SUNSite just called and MORE FINE COMPUTERY THINGS ARE A-BREWIN'! CD-ROM possibilities and some SERIOUSLY fancy Web deviltry more subversive technically than I would have believed. But that's up in the air so I'd best not say more. But it was a FINE PHONE CALL to cap off a FINE FINE DAY.



From: royalsam@studentr.msu.edu (Bozo Texino)
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: 14 Jun 1995 22:59:17 GMT
Organization: mad dog inc.

If the Lawyer Father did stuff for the bottling companies in the area,
then he may know WHO KILLED JFK!

Nixon (and Mommie Dearest) were in big D for Pepsi. Nixon consulted with
J. Edgar Hoover at Clint Murchison's house at a party the night before the
assassination. If I am not mistaken, Murchison had a piece of Dr. Pepper,
along with the Wynne family, who built Six Flags. Marina Oswald was taken
to The Inn of the Six Flags immediately after the assassination and kept
there for days for "questioning". The Pepsi convention was headquartered
at The Inn of the Six Flags.

During the VietNam war, a Pepsi factory was used as a cover for heroin

Not that it matters,
Your True Pal, Bozo Texino
Riding the 1999 Bullet Train

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