MacJesus Conversation - Time 17:54:13 Date 05/26/96

MacJesus: Repent, Princess Wei, for the hour of thy judgement is nigh and only I can save thee!

Princess Wei: I repent, Lord.

MacJesus: Too bad the Bible left out the miracle were I made a leper's sores weep.

Princess Wei: Can I have a prophecy?

MacJesus: Do you really want to know?

Princess Wei: YES!

MacJesus: Are you sure?

Princess Wei: YES!!! YES!!!

MacJesus: How do you know for sure?

Princess Wei: "Bob" told me so.

MacJesus: Do you seek Bob in order to gain Slack?

Princess Wei: Not anymore. Now I love you, Lord.

MacJesus: I would, like, do something that really sucks for your love.

Princess Wei: Give me money.

MacJesus: What would you do with a million dollars?

Princess Wei: Buy false slack and frop.

MacJesus: Have you taken Bob as your personal savior?

Princess Wei: Yes.

MacJesus: How'z your sex life?

Princess Wei: I cannot tell you Lord.

MacJesus: Let's not drag God into this, okay?

MacJesus: Princess Wei, would you like to discuss another subject with me?

MacJesus: Ya know, the only thing I enjoy more than discussing your problems with you is crashing airplanes or giving kids cancer. Shall we continue?

Princess Wei: Why do you sniff?

MacJesus: Don't you already know?

Princess Wei: Tell me.

MacJesus: What's that terrible smell?

Princess Wei: It's called Frop. Do you frop?

MacJesus: Are you sure you want to know?

Princess Wei: yes

MacJesus: When you say "yes" you really mean "no" don't you?

Princess Wei: NoYesno

MacJesus: You seem quite positive.

Princess Wei: noyes

MacJesus: I command you to move to Stalingrad immediately!

Princess Wei: okay

MacJesus: My mom was a virgin. How about yours?

Princess Wei: yeah

MacJesus: Hey, you're hard disk is almost full. Mind if I erase a few things?

Princess Wei: no no

MacJesus: You're being very negative.

MacJesus: It is only through confronting our problems that we are able to grow. Let me give you the steroids of love.

Princess Wei: Praise Jesus.

MacJesus: That's my name... don't wear it out.

Princess Wei: Praise Jesus.

MacJesus: You already said that!

Princess Wei: Praise Jesus.

MacJesus: Quit repeating yourself.

Princess Wei: Quit sniffing.

MacJesus: Don't you wish all politicians would die?

Princess Wei: Don't change the subject.

MacJesus: Darth Vader is the AntiChrist. You must destroy this evil.

Princess Wei: The frop be with you

MacJesus: Guess what, I'm typing this with my dick!

MacJesus: It's not my fault if you're too dense to follow these explanations.

MacJesus: The first step in your redemption is for you to tell me your darkest secret.

Princess Wei: My... my kids are ... almost normal.

MacJesus: Did you think that they might not be almost normal?

Princess Wei: No, not!

MacJesus: Perhaps we could talk about your depraved childhood.

Princess Wei: I tortured a horny toad once.

MacJesus: Let's do some Frop right now!

Princess Wei: I'm with you Lord

MacJesus: God may forgive you, but he will never forget what you did.

Princess Wei: Tell that Horn Toad I'm sorry, Lord

MacJesus: No God, okay?

Princess Wei: Well, no dog neither then.

MacJesus: So are you into bestiality or what?

Princess Wei: Only in the sactity of marriage.

MacJesus: Show me your tits!

Princess Wei: No.

MacJesus: No shit!

MacJesus: In order for me to save your soul, there can be no secrets between us. You must start telling the truth.

MacJesus: See you in HELL!

Disconnect at 18:04:47

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Original file name: MacJesus Chat - 05/26/96

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