Hour of Slack #1516 - Unicorn Juice


It's COOL HAND CHRIS, not "CHRIS HAND LUKE." That's who did the background music. Stang strangely miscredited it. Other music is by The Mutant Mountain Boys, Max Slack, and Ft. Christopher Tung of VideoGameRapBattles. We're replaying choice bits from Puzzling Evidence Shows these days, starting now. In the live section, Stang reads more from Rev. Lee Cypher's PhD dissertation book about the Church of the SubGenius, plus a poem about "Bob" paraphrased by Ann Glen from THE BOOK OF THE SUBGENIUS. Report on Princess Wei's visit to a NORML rally and other current national news ridiculousness. Much should-have-been-kept-secret Church history and gossip. Someone should put a stop to all this.

Monster Hunter 4 Ultimate Rap Song


Ft. Christopher Tung


"Life has been shitty to me recently, I'll just go shit on others for a few weeks until my dick grows back". -- Rev. Faux

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1  rdc-Harvard Intro 00:23

2 The Mutant Mountain Boys - By and By+2014 02:49

3 Max Slack - you might be next 03:13

4 Puzzling Evidence "Massive Frop Show" April 2015 pt 1 15:03

5 LeMur: PR Gnus #1759 00:43

6 Live WCSB 5-3-2015 40:03

Live 5-3-15:

Slack T - mindcontrolled by bob - with Stang giving credits     03:15

MONSTER HUNTER 4 ULTIMATE RAP SONG!     (with Wei singing some background vocals!) by Ft. Christopher Tung of VideoGameRapBattles 02:26

  ("They say man shouldn't play God -- good thing I'm not PLAYIN'!" -- lyric from the Monster Hunter rap song)* see below

Stang explains Monster Hunter Rap Song a little. Stang credits the whole show's background music wrongly -- it's not Chris Hand Luke, it's Cool Hand Chris, and the CD is "Junk Culture" by Cool Hand Chris. Dave calls in. Details on Popular GirlCow Davina. "Bob" bumper stickers and parking luck. Wei has to change mics. History of the Drunkard's Lament that ends with "Give me rubber blankets." Rumors by Dave. Dave wants to jump ship from the planet. Stang re-intros Rev. Lee Cypher's PhD dissertation book about CoSH, reads quotes re: civilation and resource depletion and alien end of the world. Revelation X aliens rant, and more quotes from dissertation. Philo had the answer: Unicorn juice! Wei reveals that it's made from Unicorn urine - Stang freaks, spits out juice. Dave and Wei on Unicorn Juice. Always more "Baaab."

Stang reads "Bob" poem (based on Book of SubG) by Ann Glen.

Dave tries to warn Stang about something. The putrescence or something. Paul Ryan sex poor cities are stuck that way because welfare pays too well. The poor are so rich they have no incentive to become... wait. The poor Rich! The One Percent -- you mean the SubGeniuses? America is 5% of the world but what makes us the greatest is that we have ONE QUARTER of the world's jail population! Dave's been drinking a lot of spinal fluid. The soul in the foot.

Princess Wei went to a Smoke-In -- went NORML. MrSr thought NORML meant LGTB. We're froppers, not pot smokers. The Starweed, I mean Starwood festival at Wisteria. WEI ONLY GOT 3RD IN THE OREGANO-ROLLING CONTEST. We pack the frop up the exit wounds that "Bob" gave us. The Dallas cop protest march -- Mothers Against Police Brutality, Mexicans for Immigration Reform (all skinny), Back the Blue and Open Carry Advocates (all fat). Operation Jive Mind Jade Helm and the Walmart Detention centers with tunnels to the slave camps on the moon. One school massacre every recess. Rev. Fidd Chewley: LESS TERRORISM, MORE CARE-ORISM. Dave wants aliens to hurry. PERFUNCTORY! Big words!

In the dissertation book: it disses Dave! Doesn't credit Dave! (Stang gives Dave history.) History of Puzzling Evidence show, Hal, Philo, vs. WCSB and Chas Smith, Lonsesome CD. Don't try to call this show or your phone will explode! The origins of the Puzzling Evidence Show. We're approaching the end of the show... "The time everyone's been waiting for". Show credits, URL, end, with Cool Hand Chris music. 

Dr. Sinister finally arrives for the next show! Strange Dave fade-out. Taller and louder things on the way!

Monster Hunter Theme from 5th anniversary orchestral performance

Dr. Hal Robins: http://askdrhal.com and http://radiovalencia.fm

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NOTE: THE HOUR OF SLACK is released in two versions.

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Slack, Bob Dobbs, Hour of Slack, comedy, conspiracy, collage, satire, X-Day, sex, Church of the SubGenius, Ivan Stang, The Firesign Theatre, Dr. Hal, Puzzling Evidence, Dr. Philo Drummond, Rev. Susie the Floozie, Lonesome Cowboy Dave, Ministry of Slack, McLuhan, movie trivia, DEVO, apocalypse, end of the world, Priestess Pisces, Dr. Legume, LeMur

Monster Hunter 4 Ultimate Rap Song lyrics


Ft. Christopher Tung



Welcome to the Arena

So nice to finally meet ya

We're here to extinct some elder beasts

Stick them in a museum


Slaying dragons with Great Swords

Bustin' beats on Hunting Horns

Slash and rhyme like the Hero of Time

I'm always quick to try force


Fight the prey all night and day


Cause I'm a Hunter



I'm a Monster Hunter



I'm a Monster Hunter


Now listen close as the monsters approach

Ya need some epic loot - I'm on the pursuit

Shoot 'em out of the sky and I'm hearing their cries

Ultimate combo rate, there's no escape


From the Primal Forest to the Great Sea

I'm always getting ingredients for my new recipes

We don't stand alone, my whole team's deployed

Gunning down these clowns like something out of Metroid!


Put you underground like a Black Diablo

I'm the O.G., Sonic and Mario

Ya I'm on the quest to protect the terrain

Don't pray to no god, I just killed Rajang!


Cause I'm a Hunter



I'm a Monster Hunter



I'm a Monster Hunter


Entered Rage Mode, chargin' all my might

Every battle I engage in is a final boss fight

Make sure these beasts remain mythology

I'll come at you, don't care about ecology


I'm no defender, I'm a fire starter

Decked out in my Silver Sol armor

Bring death, try to flee, but there's no way you can

Bust a master on the track, like my name's MegaMan.


There's now more monsters than ever before

It's no longer a hunt, it's the ultimate war

Ninety-eight different beasts and I gotta stop them

Can't be overcome I drop the hammer on them!


Stand my ground, got the power of will

Not to mention an endless list of Armor Skills

Summon my alliues, I'm a minion caller

And you'll see the gore spill when I slay Magala!


On top of my game, scaling Heaven's Mount

I'm the last one standing on my slayground

It's survival of the fittest, when the world needs saving

They say Man shouldn't play God, good thing I'm not playing!


Cause I'm a Hunter



I'm a Monster Hunter



I'm a Monster Hunter



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