Subject: Re: FAQ?

From: (Dennis McClain-Furmanski)

Murray Cizon ( wrote:
: Hello,
: I'm very interested in this group and the Church. However, I've ftp'd to
:, and sadly, I could not find a FAQ there. Does a FAQ for
: alt.slack, or the Church of the Subgenius exist? If so, I would
: appreciate it if someone told me where to get it--or e-mail it to my address.

: Thanks in advance.
: Murray Cizon

The FAQ is available from the Church directly. It costs one dollar.
Send it to The SubGenius Foundation, PO Box 140306, Dallas, TX, 75214.

No, I'm not kidding. It is *necessary* to do it this way.
When you get it, you'll understand why. And if this seems like the wrong way to go about things, well then, you'll probably not get it.

Look for megauser Modemac's posts. He has an address you can finger to get a copy of some Church material. But you'll still need to send for the FAQ.

-- The Doctor is on.


Subject: Re: FAQ?
From: (Rev. Leo Damascus)

In order to properly visualize why we have to do things this way...
well, it is neccessary to understand one of "Bob" favorite parables, the
parable of the Cash-Register. You can think of the Church as a kind of
holy cash-register. You send in your love offering, and your money goes
into the till, and that sale is REGISTERED for all eternity.
Now, you know about cash-registers and what happens if you just pop the
drawer, don't cha'? It may ring the bell, but no little numbers show,
only a big sign that says "NO SALE".
He used to call these stories his "selling tales".

"'No Sale? No way!", as "Bob" was often heard to say.

In order to get even the fleeting interest of the Dobbs Awareness(TM),
just send that tiny little dollar bill (along with name and address) to:
P.O. Box 140306 Dallas, TX 75214(thankyousirmayIhaveanother)
and then the scales may fall from your eyes. If not, try sending in a
fiver, or better still 30 pieces of silver for Ordainment. Then you
won't need to understand anything ever again....
Come to "Bob", he's waiting for you... just reach out... with $1....

His Most Convoluted Rev. Leo Damascus
Public Outrage Ministries, High Temple of
the ***20*** Count'em ***20****
Dancing Teen-Vixen Squid Godesses
(Reformed Compact of 2002)


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