SubGenius Activity Wave Phenomenon

From: (Rev. Ivan Stang)
Newsgroups: alt.slack

In article <>, (Matthew
Carey) wrote:

> But the other thing I wanted to say is why is it that all of my deadlines
> seem to cluster together in the same 24 hour periods? I've got two
> deadlines Monday and a psych assignment due and two tests the day after that.
> This deadline cluster thing has happened to me before. From past
> experience I predict there will be a huge buildup to Feb. 6 and then the
> day will go by relatively uneventfully. I'll probably have some
> additional unexpected pains in the ass, but that's not unusual.
> It just bothers me when this happens because I can't quite understand why.

It's the SubGenius Activity Wave Phenomenon. It happens to all of us, AND
OFTEN AT THE SAME TIME. In other words, the HELL-SHIT-CRUNCH wave hits a
whole bunch of us at once, and then the SLACKWAVE follows. I guess there
may be some who ride the Slack Wave while the others are riding the Hell
Wave, and vice versa. I caught on to this originally when I noticed the
Phone Call Cycle. Days on end may go by when NOT ONE SUBGENIUS CALLS THE
FOUNDATION. Then, suddenly, ALL OF THEM CALL ON THE SAME DAY. Since only a
fraction can get through that day, the "Call Wave" stretches out over two
or three more days before abating. TUESDAY is most often the day the Phone
Call Wave breaks. TUESDAY NIGHTS around here are INSANE. You hang up, and
it rings again. Then the rest of the week, NADA.

These MAY merely be PERCEIVED PATTERNS, not actual ones. We haven't done
the research. I haven't been monitoring alt.slack long enough to note a
pattern to heavy posting periods, but I'd be willing to bet there is one,
and not a logical one like WEEKENDS. It would more likely correspond to
phases of Venus or frog migration patterns or ley line bipolar shifts or
somesuch seemingly ridiculous and unconnected thing.

Of course, now that we have this cheap PPP access, the phone never rings
at all. Never has a chance to.

nd $1 for free information. PRABOB


Subject: Re: REVMAC: Whatever I end up saying.
From: (Brian D. Bisson)

Well, I know over this past weekend, there wasn't much activity out of
the "regulars", then here it is Wednesday, and I've got a backlog of 195
unread messages! YEE-HAW, The Mother of ALL Chaos DOES REAR HER UGLY HEAD
even in our small realm of automony.

>Of course, now that we have this cheap PPP access, the phone never rings
>at all. Never has a chance to.

I assume this means you use the Foundation hotline as your dial-out line
for Internet Access? <grin> Niiiiice.


<thinking: Damn, I gotta call Stang, there's a fleet of UFOs hanging over
Downtown Miami, setting it on Fire, and I feel lightheaded!>


<gets busy signal>


<gets busy signal>

<atoms scattered all over the place as the Sex Goddess sucks his soul
up to her mother ship>

----- - Brian.D.Bisson@Miami.FL.USA.Earth.Sol.mway
Doktor, Church of the SubGenius - #include <ordainshipscription.h>
Excrimeditated Congregation of the Overinflated Head of L. Ron Hubbard
HTTP:// for a dose of SubMediaBlasphemeWorship



From: (Michael Townsend)

BTW, there really is such a thing as a "Slack Vortex" -- the Conspiracy
has some sort of device that can suck all of the Slack out of like a 100
mile radius when it needs to. I know because living in Maine, when Bush
was Prez every time he visited Kennebunkport for the weekend an
overwhelmingly depressing grey cloud (and anti-pstench) would descend over
two counties and much of New Hampshire. And the SlackVortexer used to
totally jam the signal of our poor little 1111-watt transmitter at WMPG,
too. A complete bummer.

The hell with it.
Nobody sends tapes to
Dad's New Slacks
P.O. Box 4272
Portland, Maine 04101-4272

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