Your Yeti Ancestry -- BONOBOS

Your Yeti Ancestry -- BONOBOS

From: (Glen Kalas)

Date: 19 Feb 1995 05:22:17 GMT

Check out the March 95 issue of Scientific American for insight to our
Yeti ancestors (Bonobo Sex and Society). The bonobo is a species of
ape related to chimpanzees.

The species is best characterized as female-centered and egalitarian
and as one that substitutes sex for aggression. Whereas in most other
species sexual behavior is a fairly distinct category, in the bonobo it
is part and parcel of social relations -- and not just between males and
females. Bonobos engage in sex in virtually every partner combination
(although such contact among close family members may be suppressed).

Although chimpanzees virtually never adopt face-to-face positions,
bonobos do so in one out of three copulations in the wild. Furthermore,
the frontal orientation of the bonobo vulva and clitoris strongly
suggest the female genitalia are adapted for this position.

As soon as a caretaker approached the enclosure with food, the males
would develop erections. Even before the food was thrown into the area,
the bonobos would be inviting each other for sex: males would invite
females, and females would invite males and other females.

... anything, not just food, that arouses the interests of more than
one bonobo at a time tends to result in sexual contact. If two bonobos
approach a cardboard box thrown into their enclosure they will briefly
mount each other before playing with the box. Such situations lead to
squabbles in most other species. But bonobos are quite tolerant,
perhaps because they use sex to divert attention and to diffuse

Perhaps the bonobos most typical sexual pattern, undocumented in any
other primate, is genito-genital rubbing (or GG rubbing) between adult
females. One female facing another clings with arms and legs to a
partner that, standing on both hands and feet, lifts her off the ground.
The two females then rug their genital swelling laterally together,
emitting grins and squeals that probably reflect orgasmic experiences.

Male bonobos, too, may engage in pseudocopulation but generally perform
a variation. Standing back to back, one male briefly rubs his scrotum
against the buttocks of another. They also practice so-called
penis-fencing, in which two males hang face to face from a branch while
rubbing their erect penises together.

Bonobo males remain attached to their mothers all their lives,
following them through the forest and being dependent on them for
protection in aggressive encounters with other males. As a result, the
highest ranking males of a bonobo community tend to be sons of important

Its got pictures too.


From: Rev. Ivan Stang

I read that same SCIENTIFIC AMERICAN article on the Bonobos. I first became aware of the difference between Bonobos and chimpanzees (which I have studied somewhat) when I saw the amazing PBS special, THE NATURE OF SEX. It has become quite clear to me that the Bonobos are part of the same Yeti strain of primates that SubGenii are. In fact I wouldn't be TOO surprised if SubGeniuses could breed with Bonobos.


For those new to this argument, and for the enlightenment of namby-pamby animal rights activists, chimpanzees in the wild comprise the most vicious society imaginable. It's like a hideous cartoon of humanity. You throw a bunch of bananas to a chimp tribe, and here's what happens: the biggest, meanest, hoariest old grayback male runs up and grabs the bananas because he has beaten the shit out of all the other males many times before. He eats his fill and leaves the remnants for the other males to fight over. The gal chimps get the peels, unless they're in the harem of the bull male... then they get one banana each.


Among the Bonobo, which look like chimps to the untrained eye but are smaller and long-haired (!), you throw in a bunch of bananas and this happens:

The females converge around the bananas and for a minute there's some tension as to who gets what. But they all rub each other off and make out, having ACTUAL ORGASMS (not special to humans or Subs!), then they SHARE the bananas amongst themselves. The males hang around politely in the background until the ladies are done and then go in for the remnants of the bananas. The guys who fuck real good get more than the insenitive guys.

Nobody fights, but everybody fucks like crazy. Dad fucks Cousin Ooga, Mom fucks neighbor-bonobo Cheetah, Junior fucks Sis and everybody's happy. Among chimpanzees, as among humans, it's dog eat dog and let the meanest, least caring son of a bitch win. Among Bonobos, everybody gets a fair shake, but the ones with the most passion and horniness do somewhat better than the lazy assholes who won't eat pussy or whatever.

My theory is that AFTER the Fall of Mutantis, after the First Devolution, just as the Yeti gene was kept alive in certain branches of the prehuman tree, so too it held steadfast in the Bonobo branch of the "chimp" tree. Thus we have the SubGenii and Bonobo on one side, and the Humans and Chimpanzees on the other.

There are only 10,000 Bonobo left on the planet and judging by the political situation in their African habitat, they won't be there much longer. They're seen in zoos as "pygmy chimps" -- the ones with the gigantic cauliflower-looking pink appendages hanging from the butts of the females, who are in heat ALL the time.

I know that not all SubGenii are Bonobo-like. Some don't even care. Some have no sex. I, however, am very much that Bonobo way, if terribly frustrated most of the time. If there were no Conspiracy, I'd be chasing every female SubGenius, human or Bonobo around, and possibly even some of the cuter little fat boys, who knows. It's a "make love not war" philosophy and I think it lies at the very base of that which differentiates us from the Pinks. They really would rather make war. Even their sex is war. Our war, on the other hand, is sex.

Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke.


Subject: Re: Your Yeti Ancestry
From: (Michael Townsend)

In article <3j3h4i$>,
(SubGStang1) wrote:

>: Dad fucks Cousin Ooga

I will not allow this Stang imposter to talk about me in this way. Or my
cousin, for that matter.

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