MUST NOT BE 1998 YET.
NEW: 6XDAY SURVIVORS' REPORTS
Includes: The Bobbie Awards 2003
(layout revised by Rev.ERRor!)
PHOTOS & GRAPHICS ONLY
(Also: ADULTS ONLY)
The ad blurbs below will apply to 7-X-Day, next year. If July 5, 1998 doesn't finally occur before that supposed time.
NEW! 6X-Day Official Clothing & Gee-Gaws
at our online shop -- click here to see the many combinations of scary designs and classy garment choices... plus, this year we have special 6X-Day TOYS! Stickers! Even HEADWEAR! (Note: In our catalog it's all under "Seaonal & Limited Edition Items.")
CALL OUR TOLL-FREE NUMBER TO ORDER BY CREDIT CARD OR IF YOU HAVE SECURITY QUESTIONS:
Also: slick DVD of X-DAY EUROPE 2002, London Devival is now in our media catalog!
Confirmed Superstar Bands, Doktors: Detroit's incredible The Amino Acids!! Einstein's Secret Orchestra Dr. K'taden Legume Dr. Philo Drummond, OverMan 1st Degree G. Gordon Gordon, Bashar of Dobbstown All SubGenius Foundation employees (Jesus, Rev. Ivan Stang, Magdalen, Nickie Deathchick, etc.) Suzi Legume Princess Wei R. Doe Ed Strange Lonesome Cowboy Dave Dok Frop Sister Decadence The Rabbi Dr. Dark Zosodada Bob Diddley The Jollies Quijibo Cartel Rev. Chris Lee Priestess Pisces Cult of the Chrome Skull Shift Knob Rev. Amph Asquire Alliekat Pastor Pressure Rev. Sifu & Diana Pastor Pressure Gov. Rocknar Joy D'Veeve Banjo Bob RevDr Jack MASTER CYLINDER Entire FEDCOMS Clench - Sinphaltimus, Sloth, Yonderboy, Gonzo, Greystar Rev. Volkerding & Honeypie (Note -- we are adding names here as we get notice or pre-registrations. So... PREREGISTER! Or at least email email@example.com)
art by Rev. Jason Bell
It's time to KISS ALL CALENDARS GOODBYE!... by gathering together all the tribes and phyles of SubGeniusdom at THE COOLEST CAMPGROUND IN THE UNITED STATES!
NONE MAY STOP US -- and NONE MAY ESCAPE ONCE THE GATE CLOSES!!
CLENCH SHUT YOUR EYES AND STRUGGLE WITH ALL YOUR MIGHT, TREMBLING AND SHAKING, SWEAT POURING OFF YOU, TO TRY TO IMAGINE...
SAUCERS WILL SCREAM OVERHEAD! GREYS will SKULK in the BUSHES! ACTUAL LIVE YETIS will MATERIALIZE by YOUR CAMPFIRE! YOU WILL BECOME YOUR OWN HERO!! YOU WILL MEET FRIENDS FOR LIFE WHO WILL GET YOU RICH WITHOUT WORKING!! You will see and experience things that may SHOCK you... that may even PERMANENTLY TRAUMATIZE and SCAR you. That's OKAY. It's all part of Dobbs' UNDERPLAN. For, as prophesied by Dobbs, at 7:00 am EST, July 5, whichever year is the real 1998, might be THIS one -- you will be Ruptured up aboard your own personal Escape Vessel and serviced by Sex Goddesses/Gods while you wreak revenge on all the Pinks and Con-dupes towards whom you ever felt even the slightest dislike.
WE WILL GREET THE XISTS TOGETHER IN POWER AND GLORY!!!!
WHAT IS X-DAY? Read the SubGenius Pamphlet #1
WHERE??!? BRUSHWOOD FOLKLORE CENTER, SHERMAN, NEW YORK, USA, THIS ISLAND EARTH! BUT NOT FOR LONG!! SEE THE DIRECTIONS -- HOW TO GET TO BRUSHWOOD!
HOW MUCH??? Only $30. But it's MEMBERS ONLY. Membership is $30. If you weren't a Member already, it'll cost you $60 altogether. A CHEAP PRICE for SALVATION, if you think about it. Also a cheap price for ANY weekend-long, totally spectacular and weird campout -freakout-musical/religious event.
This year you can become as involved as you want, way ahead of time, via the
NEW X-DAY FORUM:
This is one of several new Yahoo "clubs" that have sprung up for specific SubGenius SlaClusters in the last few weeks. If you have ever joined one Yahoo club, it's easy to join others. If you never have joined one, it's REALLY EASY to join the first one. And free. The clubs feature a discussion board that can be emailed to you a couple of different ways, or can be viewed and used entirely with a web browser.
BRUSHWOOD SURVIVAL TIPS
Onan's X-DO'S AND X-DON'T'S ON X-DAY
THINGS YOU MUST BRING TO GROUND ZERO, BRUSHWOOD
TUBS AND TUBS OF PURPLE KOOL-AID!
SPONTANEOUS DOKTORBAND COMBUSTION!
TRAINED PRAIRIE SQUID GIGGIN'-PARTIES!
(Free Debeaking Tools to 1st 5 giggees)
SPORTS FIGURE BODY PART LAUNCHING!
NUDE CHAINSAW JUGGLING!
'FROP ENHANCEMENT WORKSHOPS!
LIVE FREAKS OF NATURE and ACID CASUALTIES!
FACE FUCKING BAT SPERM ANTIDOTE PUDDING COOK-OFF!
PRIVATE ADULT SEXHURT SEMINARS!
BONOBO CHIMPANZEE GOBBLIN' CONTESTS!
ODDLY NORMAL-SEEMING PEOPLE!
SEX GODDESSES, ELDER GODS, and XISTS!!!
IMAGINE -- the SHEER POWER TO BE BULLIED BY FAMOUS SUBGENIUS ZEN MASTERS FOR THE LAST TIME!!
IMAGINE -- YOUR BIG CHANCE to BUY EVERY SUBGENIUS TRINKET, ARTIFACT and GEEGAW EVER MADE by ANY SUBGENIUS at the "Final Fire Sale Black Fleece Market of Slack".
IMAGINE -- YOUR BIG CHANCE to meet those amazing, intriguing individuals you've heard on the radio, seen onstage, or read in alt.slack and the holy Church books -- AND, POST-RUPTURE, ATTACK THEIR ESCAPE VESSEL BATTLE PLANETS WITH YOURS!
IMAGINE -- YOUR BIG CHANCE to WIN BACK YOUR SOUL!!!
You'll be able to tell your great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandkids, "I was at the X-Day Final Gathering in legendary Brushwood... Yep! 'Fropped up with the great Dr. Legume hisself there... even fucked Connie Dobbs! And "Bob" fucked me -- right good, I'd say!"
SEE the HUGE PHOTO REPORT, MASSIVE NEWSGROUP FEEDBACK FROM VIOLENT, DEPRAVED 4X-DAY CULT EVENT IN NEW YORK!!
1999'S XX-DAY (TONS OF PICS!! NOT FOR KIDS!!)
1998 -- THE GREATEST OF THEM ALL
(Until the REAL 1998 arrives!)
Rev. Mary Magdalen created a TRULY inspiring and hilarious "MUSICAL SLIDE SHOW" that sums up the whole event PERFECTLY. See: MAGDALEN'S SEXY XXX-DAY MOVIE!
Rev. Codini's 4XD: 7 Rings of HELL
MAP OF BRUSHWOOD, SHERMAN, NY
by Irrev. Friday Jones
X-Day Brushwood Aerial Photo and Targeting Info
UFOs PHOTOGRAPHED OVER BRUSHWOOD!! See the incredible pictures by Saint N, taken from his Cessna!
ADULTS ONLY: earn the Church $ per click by checking out these two SPECIALTY PORN SITES:
XXXSPACEGIRLS.COM and WWW.HORRORSEX.COM